... and great was its fall

13»

Comments

  • I actually think most of it is child humour. Like the one I was told yesterday:

    Q: what is brown and sticky?
    A: a stick!

    And my favourite all time joke:

    Q: what do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?
    A: a stupid stick!

    Both are absolutely hilarious as far as I'm concerned.
  • I love them. They make my son cringe.
  • I like those, too. As well as "What's black and white and red all over?" "A blushing zebra." (Alternative to "read", which is a newspaper.)
  • HugalHugal Shipmate
    Rossweisse wrote: »
    anoesis wrote: »
    Rossweisse wrote: »
    mousethief wrote: »
    Matthew 18:3
    At least half of little children do not find dick jokes remotely funny. Only those with Y chromosomes are that obnoxious.
    Look, you can like dick jokes or you can not like dick jokes - that's fine. But when you start proclaiming an entire subset of the population "obnoxious" due to the sheer fact of their maleness - that's worse than obnoxious.

    Or was it a joke?

    Partially. (But I really do get tired of Guy Humor, and assumptions that the entire population finds it hilarious.)

    They don’t. Woman make jokes about parts of their body and things that they experience. If we were to criticise that in the way you do for blokes jokes women would complain.
  • Hugal--

    In your experience, do women make those jokes with men around? Knowing that men are around?
  • anoesisanoesis Shipmate
    edited March 2020
    Golden Key wrote: »
    Hugal--
    In your experience, do women make those jokes with men around? Knowing that men are around?
    Oh my - obviously this is only a single anecdote, but one of the funniest stand-up gags I've ever heard was a female comedian relating the content of a conversation with her mother about pubic hair going grey. The audience around me was at least half male, and whether they were as amused as I was, I couldn't say, but they certainly weren't all sitting there with mouths like a cat's arse.

    As I confessed on the previous page, I find dick jokes funny*, despite being female - and I have to say it hadn't occurred to me that I was any sort of oddity in this respect. However, if I am, it'll hardly be the first time I'm an oddity. But, @Golden Key , the way your comment above is phrased does kind of suggest that there is some shadowy sort of etiquette that ought to be observed wrt dick jokes - ie: women don't visit their jokes on men, and men should afford women the same courtesy - which leaves me entirely at a loss. Isn't humour meant to be a bridge? A communication device? A way to say those things which are difficult to broach otherwise? An icebreaker for tricky topics or stilted group dynamics?

    Or are you talking about courtesy? ie: if you have reason to believe that I will not enjoy listening to dick jokes, then you should not subject me to them? In which case, sure. People should attempt to be courteous in their dealings with others all the times. So, if some salty humour is met with stony stares or rolling eyes, desist, guys. And stay desisted. But due to my own preferences, I don't think it's reasonable to expect somebody to assume, as a starting position, that they need to treat me as some sort of special flower who's in need of careful handling.

    {I'm going to add here something that's been tickling my brain all day, and that's the slim possibility that those who find dick jokes wholly unfunny are including in their definition of that category the receipt of unsolicited pictures of someone else's junk. To be clear, I don't find that in the least bit funny either. I find it two shades short of assault. But I also find it incredibly difficult to imagine either @SimonToad or @mousethief raising their voices in defence of such a practice, so I (and most probably they) are talking about jokes and not intimidation. I mean, c'mon. Dicks are just...inherently funny. Though obviously it could just be me. :wink: }

    *and most smut, to be honest.
  • HugalHugal Shipmate
    Golden Key wrote: »
    Hugal--

    In your experience, do women make those jokes with men around? Knowing that men are around?

    Yes.
  • I thought female stand-ups now run the full gamut of menopause, periods, boobs, clitoris, and so on, and it seems a relief to me. The spell check just rephrased clitoris as California, is this a clit joke?
  • KarlLBKarlLB Shipmate
    I will merely observe that I had a not well thought out assumption that finding farts funny was a boy thing, right up until the moment my daughter was old enough to have a sense of humour and let rip...
  • KarlLB wrote: »
    I will merely observe that I had a not well thought out assumption that finding farts funny was a boy thing, right up until the moment my daughter was old enough to have a sense of humour and let rip...

    Yes, I don't get this "dick jokes are for men". I thought many women find dicks hilarious, especially crest-fallen. Cf., are you pleased to see me, or are you carrying a hot rod, attributed to Mae West, but maybe apocryphal.
  • RooKRooK Admin Emeritus
    My nurse-practitioner girlfriend knows and enjoys a far greater breadth of genital-jokes than I do.

    Prudishness is not contained to a gender, and neither is prudishness necessarily good or bad. It's just who some of us are, and that's OK. Being respectful and tolerant of other people's preferences and proclivities isn't that hard.

    Unless you are a stand-up comedian. Then your shit is fucked.
  • A hard man is good to find. I had a girl-friend who used to say that, the slut.
  • finelinefineline Kerygmania Host, 8th Day Host
    I actually know quite a few women who enjoy dick jokes, but often their dick humour is quite different from guy dick humour - it's more at the expense of the dick!
  • RooKRooK Admin Emeritus
    I'm struggling to think of any dick jokes that aren't at the expense of the subject phallus...

    Maybe I'm just overly negative. Mind you, I'm still laughing over the thought of @Doublethink stumbling across images of dicks with mohawks after an exchange in another conversation.
  • edited March 2020
    Golden Key wrote: »
    I like those, too. As well as "What's black and white and red all over?" "A blushing zebra." (Alternative to "read", which is a newspaper.)

    A skunk with diaper rash!
    A hard man is good to find. I had a girl-friend who used to say that, the slut.
    This I do not find at all funny. It's awful. Because "slut" is something not one should call anyone in my world.
  • anoesisanoesis Shipmate
    edited March 2020
    A hard man is good to find. I had a girl-friend who used to say that, the slut.

    I think the use of the word 'slut' is problematic, even in a humorous context. In a general sense, this is mostly because there's no equivalently pejorative term which can be applied to the male of the species - in this particular sense, because "enjoys men and sex" ≠ "has a vast sexual history/many casual sexual encounters/a relaxed approach to monogamy", or any of the other myriad subtle variant ways in which the term can be (and unfortunately, is) used.
  • RooK wrote: »
    I'm struggling to think of any dick jokes that aren't at the expense of the subject phallus...

    Maybe I'm just overly negative. Mind you, I'm still laughing over the thought of @Doublethink stumbling across images of dicks with mohawks after an exchange in another conversation.

    My brain threw that at me, I managed to forget the mental image, and now you @ it back into my hippocampus !
  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    A hard man is good to find. I had a girl-friend who used to say that, the slut.

    I did not know you were that old. I heard it in the 50s and it was ancient then.
  • anoesisanoesis Shipmate
    The tune (if such you can call it) of the first song reminds me very much of "I'm too sexy for my shirt" - I wonder if it's intentional?
  • Yes, I thought that.
  • What’s red and white and lives up a tree?

    A sanitary owl
  • This whole thread is interesting. It starts out very funny, but after a while drags on until it becomes repetitive and stops being funny, sort of like pornography, I suppose. There's a limit to how much new material can be dredged up to keep the audience, so I'll refrain from telling my favourite Mordecai Richler Jewish joke.
  • Gee D wrote: »
    A hard man is good to find. I had a girl-friend who used to say that, the slut.

    I did not know you were that old. I heard it in the 50s and it was ancient then.

    I heard it in 2020, and it still made me laugh, but that's old age.
  • bassobasso Shipmate
    Okay, here's a dick joke that my father told me (and my mother!) more than 50 years ago.

    An American comes back to the States with an unusual condition in his penis. His doctor tells him that it's incurable, and the only treatment is amputation.

    This is not what he wants to hear, so he goes to another doctor for a second opinion. Then a third, and a fourth. They all shake their heads and agree with the first doc.

    So he flies to Hong Kong to consult with a renowned specialist there. The Chinese doctor examines him and takes a history. Afterwards, he says, "Oh, these Western doctors! All they know is cut, cut, cut. Just leave it alone for a couple of weeks and it'll drop off."

    I offer this as an example of a dick joke that women usually find funnier than men do. Men tend to turn slightly green at the punchline.
  • RossweisseRossweisse Hell Host, 8th Day Host
    ...This I do not find at all funny. It's awful. Because "slut" is something not one should call anyone in my world.
    Words like "slut" and "promiscuous" tend to be flung exclusively at women. Why isn't a male who sleeps around a slut? Why isn't he considered promiscuous? I strongly suspect that it's because Real Men are supposed to behave that way, while women definitely are not. Men are conquerors; women are the conquered. It's ugly. It's also The Way Things Are.


  • basso wrote: »
    Okay, here's a dick joke that my father told me (and my mother!) more than 50 years ago.

    An American comes back to the States with an unusual condition in his penis. His doctor tells him that it's incurable, and the only treatment is amputation.

    This is not what he wants to hear, so he goes to another doctor for a second opinion. Then a third, and a fourth. They all shake their heads and agree with the first doc.

    So he flies to Hong Kong to consult with a renowned specialist there. The Chinese doctor examines him and takes a history. Afterwards, he says, "Oh, these Western doctors! All they know is cut, cut, cut. Just leave it alone for a couple of weeks and it'll drop off."

    I offer this as an example of a dick joke that women usually find funnier than men do. Men tend to turn slightly green at the punchline.

    Dick jokes rare get better than this. Not too long, not too hard.
  • I kind
    This whole thread is interesting. It starts out very funny, but after a while drags on until it becomes repetitive and stops being funny, sort of like pornography, I suppose. There's a limit to how much new material can be dredged up to keep the audience, so I'll refrain from telling my favourite Mordecai Richler Jewish joke.

    Far be it from me to question other people's kinks, but have you considered the possibility that looking for laughs in pornography might not be using it for best effect?
  • anoesisanoesis Shipmate
    mousethief wrote: »
    Not too long, not too hard.
    Oh, very good, very good...
  • I kind
    This whole thread is interesting. It starts out very funny, but after a while drags on until it becomes repetitive and stops being funny, sort of like pornography, I suppose. There's a limit to how much new material can be dredged up to keep the audience, so I'll refrain from telling my favourite Mordecai Richler Jewish joke.

    Far be it from me to question other people's kinks, but have you considered the possibility that looking for laughs in pornography might not be using it for best effect?

    The comment was badly worded. I meant the tedium in it rather than any possible humour.
  • Rossweisse wrote: »
    ...This I do not find at all funny. It's awful. Because "slut" is something not one should call anyone in my world.
    Words like "slut" and "promiscuous" tend to be flung exclusively at women. Why isn't a male who sleeps around a slut? Why isn't he considered promiscuous? I strongly suspect that it's because Real Men are supposed to behave that way, while women definitely are not. Men are conquerors; women are the conquered. It's ugly. It's also The Way Things Are.


    Agreed. @quetzalcoatl apparently is old and finds it funny. I am old and don't. But I wouldn't use the word "nigger" either. Both are words of oppression and putting in their place.
    Gee D wrote: »
    A hard man is good to find. I had a girl-friend who used to say that, the slut.

    I did not know you were that old. I heard it in the 50s and it was ancient then.

    I heard it in 2020, and it still made me laugh, but that's old age.


  • Well, I heard 'a hard man is good to find' in 2020. But of course, you knew that, but decided to misrepresent me.
  • edited March 2020
    You posted:
    A hard man is good to find. I had a girl-friend who used to say that, the slut.

    Then you posted:
    Well, I heard 'a hard man is good to find' in 2020. But of course, you knew that, but decided to misrepresent me.

    Are you saying that you did not call your girlfriend "slut". Or are you saying that you think calling a woman "slut" is funny. "A hard man is good to find" is the joke.

    Where's the misrepresentation? You posted "slut". That's pretty bad.
  • ZappaZappa Ecclesiantics Host
    I'm with you, Rossweisse. But lord luv a duck, didn't this thread lose course. Thanks @Telford. I shall register you in my consciousnesses as a git of the lowest order.

    Actually, no I won't. Gits of the lowest order have a whole heap more panache than you could dream of. So too does the subject matter of aforementioned farty poo bum jokes. Just get over yourself (which I suspect would not be a herculean task, as there seems to be awful little of substance to get over).
  • Zappa wrote: »
    I'm with you, Rossweisse. But lord luv a duck, didn't this thread lose course.

    Self-righteous dudgeon brings out the worst in us.
  • RooKRooK Admin Emeritus
    mousethief wrote: »
    Zappa wrote: »
    I'm with you, Rossweisse. But lord luv a duck, didn't this thread lose course.

    Self-righteous dudgeon brings out the worst in us.

    I sense a lot of self-loathing in that dick joke, @mousethief.
  • RuthRuth Shipmate
    Here's the dick joke my dad told at the dinner table many years ago, which as a teenager I found hilarious:

    Two guys who are friends are at the beach, and one has way more success attracting women than the other. His friend asks for the secret, and the guy says, "Simple -- wear a speedo and put a potato in it."

    The next day he tries this, walks up and down the beach with a potato in his speedo, and no luck -- and what's worse, women are just pointing and laughing at him.

    So he asks his friend why this isn't working, and the friend says, "You gotta put the potato in the front!
  • Okay, I laughed.
  • RossweisseRossweisse Hell Host, 8th Day Host
    Okay, I smiled.
  • RuthRuth Shipmate
    Both of you?!


    My work here is done.
  • RooK wrote: »
    mousethief wrote: »
    Zappa wrote: »
    I'm with you, Rossweisse. But lord luv a duck, didn't this thread lose course.

    Self-righteous dudgeon brings out the worst in us.

    I sense a lot of self-loathing in that dick joke, @mousethief.

    You really know how to hurt a guy.
This discussion has been closed.