My sister in the NE refers to someone's live-in boyfriend or girlfriend as a 'bidie-in'. But that's not a word to do without - it's a good one.
"Bidie" is an excellent word. Anyone of any age can be a "bidie" whereas "girlfriend" or "boyfriend" sounds ridiculous for a middle aged couple. I can't think of any word in English which suits the long-term unmarried as well as "bidie"
I can't think of any word in English which suits the long-term unmarried as well as "bidie"
"Partner" probably comes the closest, and carries nice implications of domestic equality. It's also, of course, used to mean a business partner, collaborator on some project, and so on, providing plenty of opportunity for 90s sitcom humour.
I'd class that meaning of 'partner' as a euphemism we can well do without. Because of the word's long-hallowed business, legal and statutory meaning, using it to describe shackers is seriously ambiguous.
What's particularly offensive are those who describe the person to whom they are lawfully married as their 'partner'. It's as though they are ashamed of being conventional, an embarrassment lest they be thought bourgeois.
@mousethief 'surveille' as a verb is a usage I've never encountered until it was mentioned on this thread, and one which I've still not met in the wild. And I'm not 100 yet.
While I'm happy to accept you're right @mousethief, I am very surprised to hear the word is as old as that. I am reasonably widely read and it was new to me. And jarring.
While I'm happy to accept you're right @mousethief, I am very surprised to hear the word is as old as that. I am reasonably widely read and it was new to me. And jarring.
"Legacy". I woke up this morning to find that the computer had been stuffed with an unwanted program called Microsoft Edge, which I never had before. I found that it was designed to replace the 'legacy' version of the same program. Oddly enough, the Banned Words list already states:
Legacy: Applied to anything from computer software to aircraft engines.
Meaning: Our old product is still good, but we gave it this reverent title so you won’t think we blundered when we tried to replace it.
Ah ha, that happened to my friend. He appeared in my room with his laptop and blue squiggles all over the place and a look of despair. I couldn't work out how it had happened. But he now has Chrome as his default.
While I'm happy to accept you're right @mousethief, I am very surprised to hear the word is as old as that. I am reasonably widely read and it was new to me. And jarring.
While I'm happy to accept you're right @mousethief, I am very surprised to hear the word is as old as that. I am reasonably widely read and it was new to me. And jarring.
At work our Diversity Champion agrees to, among other things...
"Leverage connections from their various networks..."
Which I think means 'Talk to people you know about what you're doing to support diversity' but who knows?
That definitely merits a grrrr.
I suspect what he or she really means - but wouldn't admit it even to themselves - would be 'go round talking to people and attending meetings without actually having to do anything or show I've achieved anything. As long as I can show I'm doing that, I'm doing what I'm paid to do'. It's another version of 'I must be important because I go to lots of meetings'.
'Connections' and 'networks' in that context are a negative indicator.
Being of a certain age, I can never hear it but 'the wonder horse!' pings round my brain.
(For those of you this side of pensionable, this sagacious animal continually apprehended wrongdoers by rearing and neighing at them. Usually about 5 pm on a Saturday, in black and white).
What's particularly offensive are those who describe the person to whom they are lawfully married as their 'partner'. It's as though they are ashamed of being conventional, an embarrassment lest they be thought bourgeois.
In my experience they are doing it because it's a neutral term.
What's particularly offensive are those who describe the person to whom they are lawfully married as their 'partner'. It's as though they are ashamed of being conventional, an embarrassment lest they be thought bourgeois.
I have a friend who used to take care to use "partner" to describe her husband, as a political statement that she wasn't going to use a word that gay couples weren't able to use (pre-marriage equality). She now tends to use "spouse".
What's particularly offensive are those who describe the person to whom they are lawfully married as their 'partner'. It's as though they are ashamed of being conventional, an embarrassment lest they be thought bourgeois.
In my experience they are doing it because it's a neutral term.
I would use partner to describe my wife in some situations. It is general and puts me on an equal footing with others in civil partnerships, long-term relationships (my son and partner have been together for 7 years. Girlfriend doesn't really work. it is longer than some marriages last so partner seems to work there). For me, it is about saying "we have different ways of having long-term relationships - but that is fine".
'Er indoors is quite offensive, really. And harks back to a time when the wife would have been indoors much of the time, and the man outside working.
In my case, my wife has been out much more than I have this year - she has been working, while i have been WFH. SO I am "Im indoors".
My late (and much missed) wife always referred to me as "Husband" when talking to any of our friends, or to me. If she used any other word for me then I knew that I was in trouble!
To her I think it described a very special relationship.
A number of years ago we were driving through the-middle-of-nowhere in Alaska and stopped to eat in a diner-type restaurant. I was eavesdropping on the two men in the booth behind me. One was not looking forward to having another mouth to feed: "The wife went and got herself pregnant!"
I really wanted to turn around and exclaim "Really? All by herself? A miracle!" (But I figured he wouldn't take kindly to that, and was probably armed.)
I find it even more offensive to hear someone refer to their partner as the wife rather than my wife. It sounds as though she is just an object.
This is one of my pet peeves. I have never heard a woman say "the husband."
But "the old man" and "the old lady" are equal opportunity in using "the".
The only person I know who says "the old man" is a parishioner who calls her father-in-law that -- apparently the whole family does (even when he's present).
Returning to 'partner':- Perhaps in order to avoid misunderstandings, we need some new terms. 'Workpartner' or 'Businesspartner', as opposd to 'Bedpartner' or, if were're being romantical, 'Lifepartner'. l eschew 'Sexpartner', as implying a commercial transaction.
I have a recollection that somewhere in the Paston Letters (ie 15thC) among the 'and best wishes to' there is the term 'bedmate' indicating wife of the addressee.
I suppose one of the interesting things about this thread is it highlights what works for one doesn't necessarily work for all. 'Up and running' is a perfectly ordinary, everyday phrase with a very clear meaning, so far as I can see.
It's certainly a phrase that was well in use in my own world long before the word 'computer' became fashionable.
And as for being pointless? Doesn't how we use our words also depend on context? If I asked someone whether or not they had started their new Bible study course and their reply was 'yeah, it's up and running' - I would have a fair idea what that answer meant. Which was surely the point of my asking the question? However, if one where asking virtually any question of a certain Prime Minister during PMQs and the answer were 'wah, wah wah, it's up and running' - then, yes, that would probably be entirely pointless!
I always associate the phrase with the early days of motoring. You started the engine up with the starting handle, and, with luck it would keep going while you nipped smartly into the driving seat, pulled a few levers and hurrah! you were up and running.
And before that with trains: getting steam up was not the same as actually moving, but a necessary precondition.
So a perfectly good summation of the process of initiation + activity = realisation.
I have seen it suggested that it originated in athletics to indicate that a runner had gone from the crouched start position, and was now making speed along the track.
I suppose coming form an IT background, there is real validity in the phrase. "Up" - means everything has started "Running" everything is accessible. They used to be very separate processes (sometimes still are).
I am starting a new role next week. I will be "up" with all I need fairly quickly, but am only "running" when I am able to actually work.
I have seen it suggested that it originated in athletics to indicate that a runner had gone from the crouched start position, and was now making speed along the track.
That certainly makes sense to me. And I'm sure I have heard horse-racing commentators say, "They're off and running" - i.e. it hasn't been a false start.
Hard to see how a word or phrase can be "pointless" if people use it to convey clearly to other people what they intend to. That's what words/phrases are used for. That's their point. Seems a bit of an overreach to proclaim perfectly serviceable words useless just because one doesn't like them personally.
Comments
It's a phrase that's been around all my lifetime - which commenced some decades before computers came into anything like common usage.
"Bidie" is an excellent word. Anyone of any age can be a "bidie" whereas "girlfriend" or "boyfriend" sounds ridiculous for a middle aged couple. I can't think of any word in English which suits the long-term unmarried as well as "bidie"
"Partner" probably comes the closest, and carries nice implications of domestic equality. It's also, of course, used to mean a business partner, collaborator on some project, and so on, providing plenty of opportunity for 90s sitcom humour.
What's particularly offensive are those who describe the person to whom they are lawfully married as their 'partner'. It's as though they are ashamed of being conventional, an embarrassment lest they be thought bourgeois.
It's only new if you're 100 years old.
I agree, though, that it’s not a word I’d use.
The only dictionary I can find which suggests a pre-C20th usage is Merriam Webster which gives 1884, but no citation.
Legacy: Applied to anything from computer software to aircraft engines.
Meaning: Our old product is still good, but we gave it this reverent title so you won’t think we blundered when we tried to replace it.
So I've missed the word on this thread, as well as more generally. My humble apologies.
No worries. With regard to this particular word, I don’t think you missed much.
At work our Diversity Champion agrees to, among other things...
"Leverage connections from their various networks..."
Which I think means 'Talk to people you know about what you're doing to support diversity' but who knows?
I suspect what he or she really means - but wouldn't admit it even to themselves - would be 'go round talking to people and attending meetings without actually having to do anything or show I've achieved anything. As long as I can show I'm doing that, I'm doing what I'm paid to do'. It's another version of 'I must be important because I go to lots of meetings'.
'Connections' and 'networks' in that context are a negative indicator.
Champion: This is a relatively new addition to the business management vocabulary. It is synonymous with human sacrifice.
(For those of you this side of pensionable, this sagacious animal continually apprehended wrongdoers by rearing and neighing at them. Usually about 5 pm on a Saturday, in black and white).
jj-HH
The White Horses theme still counting as one of the best TV theme tunes ever.
Belle and Sebastian, of course, lend their name to the band.
White horses: https://youtu.be/jtCNbERKvMs
Robinson Crusoe: https://youtu.be/NQHB1zd1f5M
Belle & Sébastien: https://youtu.be/wc_09iQ4l5k
I’ve double-checked these (which I should have done first time round. Sorry)
In my experience they are doing it because it's a neutral term.
I have a friend who used to take care to use "partner" to describe her husband, as a political statement that she wasn't going to use a word that gay couples weren't able to use (pre-marriage equality). She now tends to use "spouse".
And sounds less clinical than "spouse".
'Er indoors is quite offensive, really. And harks back to a time when the wife would have been indoors much of the time, and the man outside working.
In my case, my wife has been out much more than I have this year - she has been working, while i have been WFH. SO I am "Im indoors".
But she would have been working indoors, not sitting down relaxing etc.
To her I think it described a very special relationship.
I really wanted to turn around and exclaim "Really? All by herself? A miracle!" (But I figured he wouldn't take kindly to that, and was probably armed.)
But "the old man" and "the old lady" are equal opportunity in using "the".
I suppose one of the interesting things about this thread is it highlights what works for one doesn't necessarily work for all. 'Up and running' is a perfectly ordinary, everyday phrase with a very clear meaning, so far as I can see.
It's certainly a phrase that was well in use in my own world long before the word 'computer' became fashionable.
And as for being pointless? Doesn't how we use our words also depend on context? If I asked someone whether or not they had started their new Bible study course and their reply was 'yeah, it's up and running' - I would have a fair idea what that answer meant. Which was surely the point of my asking the question? However, if one where asking virtually any question of a certain Prime Minister during PMQs and the answer were 'wah, wah wah, it's up and running' - then, yes, that would probably be entirely pointless!
And before that with trains: getting steam up was not the same as actually moving, but a necessary precondition.
So a perfectly good summation of the process of initiation + activity = realisation.
I am starting a new role next week. I will be "up" with all I need fairly quickly, but am only "running" when I am able to actually work.