Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson

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  • TelfordTelford Shipmate
    Telford wrote: »
    Telford wrote: »
    How do you think that all these teachers got infected ?
    I don't know. No one knows. Only an idiot jumps to a conclusion such as this is "a disregard for social distancing in the staff room". But, I'm going to state that I would say bad luck is a more reasonable explanation than the teachers broke the hygiene guidelines.

    Do you suspect that some teachers caught it off other teachers
    Probably. That doesn't mean that the teachers were disregarding social distancing requirements.
    This is true. I have merely come to a logical conclusion.

  • TelfordTelford Shipmate
    Telford wrote: »
    *sigh*

    Outraged and Insulted of Shropshire has spoken!

    (But, as usual, without comprehension - whether deliberately so or not, I couldn't say).
    I have no idea who you are on about but do you want to try and answer my questions

    No. I have better things to do.
    In future I will be ignoring your insults. The same applies to your chums





  • Does anyone know why Telford is still on the Hell board? He deliberately chooses a forum where the board guidelines warn explicitly you may be personally insulted if you piss people off; and his main contribution is whining about being personally insulted.

    He doesn't seem stupid in an obvious way. He knows he doesn't have to be in a place where he is insulted and that it's entirely his own choice he is. Can we presume he actually enjoys being insulted, and enjoys whining about being insulted; and that really the more he's insulted the more he loves it but he just doesn't want to let on, in case it stops?

  • BoogieBoogie Shipmate
    Yep.

    Attention seeking.
  • KarlLBKarlLB Shipmate
    Anselmina wrote: »
    Does anyone know why Telford is still on the Hell board? He deliberately chooses a forum where the board guidelines warn explicitly you may be personally insulted if you piss people off; and his main contribution is whining about being personally insulted.

    He doesn't seem stupid in an obvious way. He knows he doesn't have to be in a place where he is insulted and that it's entirely his own choice he is. Can we presume he actually enjoys being insulted, and enjoys whining about being insulted; and that really the more he's insulted the more he loves it but he just doesn't want to let on, in case it stops?

    Yeah, that's what I was alluding to in my response to his self abuse comment above.
  • TelfordTelford Shipmate
    Anselmina wrote: »
    Does anyone know why Telford is still on the Hell board? He deliberately chooses a forum where the board guidelines warn explicitly you may be personally insulted if you piss people off; and his main contribution is whining about being personally insulted.

    He doesn't seem stupid in an obvious way. He knows he doesn't have to be in a place where he is insulted and that it's entirely his own choice he is. Can we presume he actually enjoys being insulted, and enjoys whining about being insulted; and that really the more he's insulted the more he loves it but he just doesn't want to let on, in case it stops?

    and your main contribution appears to be to moan about me
  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    Given his references to his advanced age I'm going with the sclerosis of the intellect and emotions that can afflict the aged - hence the rigidity, lack of empathy and inability to actually discuss.

    I think, unless you discover a hitherto unnoticed benefit of hitting your head off a brick wall, you just scroll past.
  • BoogieBoogie Shipmate
    Firenze wrote: »
    Given his references to his advanced age I'm going with the sclerosis of the intellect and emotions that can afflict the aged - hence the rigidity, lack of empathy and inability to actually discuss.

    I think, unless you discover a hitherto unnoticed benefit of hitting your head off a brick wall, you just scroll past.

    Fair points. But he seems to be active in so many discussions spreading his strange form of disordered opposition. Enough people take the bait for too much derailing to occur. It’s becoming tedious and annoying.

  • I think his lack of a GSOH (or any SOH, for that matter), and his obvious need of an Irony-O-Meter (I have a reconditioned one for sale at just £999.99 inc. VAT) don't exactly help.
    Back to the subject of Our Great Leader, the Lord Protector III (Oliver and Richard Cromwell having been LPs I and II) - has anything much been seen of him lately?

    If he's still not feeling Up To The Job after Covid-19 and Wilfred, fair enough - but then, where's his Master, Great ConDom the Far-Sighted?
  • Apropos of nothing, there are some rather scurrilous rumours circulating on twitter that I cannot repeat here for legal reasons but which certainly don't strike me as at all implausible.
  • Drat! Where's the ISWYM-but-I'm still-intrigued emoji when you need it?
    :confounded:
  • Back to the subject of Our Great Leader, the Lord Protector III (Oliver and Richard Cromwell having been LPs I and II) - has anything much been seen of him lately?

    He's in Devon today visiting a shipyard
    Apropos of nothing, there are some rather scurrilous rumours circulating on twitter that I cannot repeat here for legal reasons but which certainly don't strike me as at all implausible.

    Are you referring to the rumours he will resign due to ill-health within six months? Because he addressed this directly today:

    https://www.devonlive.com/news/devon-news/boris-johnson-devon-pm-directly-4455813
  • yohan300 wrote: »

    Are you referring to the rumours he will resign due to ill-health within six months? Because he addressed this directly today:

    Nope.
  • Well, quite. Rumours of an impending announcement about retirement due to ill-health could hardly be described as 'scurrilous'...

    We mustn't fish!
  • https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/downing-street-boris-johnson-quit-prime-minister-coronavirus-health-a9687206.html
    Downing Street has been forced to deny claims that Boris Johnson could quit as prime minister within six months because of ongoing health problems due to coronavirus.

    The father-in-law of Mr Johnson’s top aide Dominic Cummings was reported to have told a holidaymaker that Mr Johnson was still struggling badly with the after-effects of the Covid-19 infection that saw him taken into intensive care in April.

    Well...

    AFZ
  • Ah-ha! - if it's being strenuously denied, that means it'll happen.

    But WTF has ConDom's pa-in-law got to do with it?

    (I can well believe that the Lord Protector III is indeed still suffering the after-effects of Covid-19).
  • I have always understood that one should never believe anything unless it is officially denied, so I live in hope. I read that BJ's Eminence Grise (do I really need to translate that/) is now engaging with the Armed Forces. Very Interesting . . .
  • Ooo...an autumn coup d'etat?

    Meanwhile, to take our minds off such frivolous things, I see that the Lord Protector III has joined in the brouhaha over the Last Night Of The Proms...

    Bread and circuses...
    :disappointed:
  • Ah-ha! - if it's being strenuously denied, that means it'll happen.

    But WTF has ConDom's pa-in-law got to do with it?

    The press are clutching at straws, it's August which means it's Silly Season. Advisor's wife's father said something vaguely about his daughter's husband's line manager's improving health to some guy on a beach therefore cuts the mustard and means the resignation of the Prime Minster is imminent.
  • Yes, but how will we know he's resigned? What difference will we notice?
  • Yes, but how will we know he's resigned? What difference will we notice?

    There might be a PM who actually functions (I nearly said "is competent" but then remembered the pool of candidates is the Parliamentary Conservative Party).
  • Yes, but how will we know he's resigned? What difference will we notice?

    That depends what happens after Graham Brady is activated.
  • yohan300 wrote: »
    Yes, but how will we know he's resigned? What difference will we notice?

    That depends what happens after Graham Brady is activated.

    Is he currently dormant?
  • edited August 2020
    Yes, but how will we know he's resigned? What difference will we notice?

    There might be a PM who actually functions (I nearly said "is competent" but then remembered the pool of candidates is the Parliamentary Conservative Party).
    There will be a Conservative Party Leadership contest in which the party goes through the motions of democracy with several "who is that?" candidates putting their name forward so that they can be roundly beaten by whoever Dom Cummings has chosen to be his next puppet. This will fill the news for several weeks while we forget how bad the nation is.
  • This will fill the news for several weeks while we forget how bad the nation is.

    I assume this is what the present confected outrage over the Last Night of the Proms consists of; I notice Johnson was quick to present himself to the press on this issue, when he has been absent on other such trivial issues such as the economy, the end of the furlough scheme, children returning to school, etc.
  • Gavin Williamson posed with a whip on his desk, allegedly to remind MPs that as a former Chief Whip he knows their Dark Secrets. These must include Boris's Dark Secrets. Remember Jim Hacker, anyone?
  • Telford wrote: »
    Anselmina wrote: »
    Does anyone know why Telford is still on the Hell board? He deliberately chooses a forum where the board guidelines warn explicitly you may be personally insulted if you piss people off; and his main contribution is whining about being personally insulted.

    He doesn't seem stupid in an obvious way. He knows he doesn't have to be in a place where he is insulted and that it's entirely his own choice he is. Can we presume he actually enjoys being insulted, and enjoys whining about being insulted; and that really the more he's insulted the more he loves it but he just doesn't want to let on, in case it stops?

    and your main contribution appears to be to moan about me

    I live to serve!
  • TelfordTelford Shipmate
    Boogie wrote: »
    Firenze wrote: »
    Given his references to his advanced age I'm going with the sclerosis of the intellect and emotions that can afflict the aged - hence the rigidity, lack of empathy and inability to actually discuss.

    I think, unless you discover a hitherto unnoticed benefit of hitting your head off a brick wall, you just scroll past.

    Fair points. But he seems to be active in so many discussions spreading his strange form of disordered opposition. Enough people take the bait for too much derailing to occur. It’s becoming tedious and annoying.

    Anything constructive to say ?
  • Telford wrote: »
    Boogie wrote: »
    Firenze wrote: »
    Given his references to his advanced age I'm going with the sclerosis of the intellect and emotions that can afflict the aged - hence the rigidity, lack of empathy and inability to actually discuss.

    I think, unless you discover a hitherto unnoticed benefit of hitting your head off a brick wall, you just scroll past.

    Fair points. But he seems to be active in so many discussions spreading his strange form of disordered opposition. Enough people take the bait for too much derailing to occur. It’s becoming tedious and annoying.

    Anything constructive to say ?

    Right back at ya.
  • BoogieBoogie Shipmate
    edited August 2020
    @Telford said -
    Anything constructive to say ?

    Yes, I have.

    I want you to know that a lot of people are put off by your posting and are, like me, annoyed that you derail threads by making them all about you.

    I think that it’s constructive criticism to let you know that. It would also improve the Ship if you could see the problem and desisted.

    But I give up now, I will say no more on the subject.
  • Eirenist wrote: »
    Gavin Williamson posed with a whip on his desk, allegedly to remind MPs that as a former Chief Whip he knows their Dark Secrets. These must include Boris's Dark Secrets. Remember Jim Hacker, anyone?

    Yes indeed. O for the chaos of a Jim Hacker government!
    :wink:

  • la vie en rougela vie en rouge Circus Host, 8th Day Host
    edited August 2020
    Jim Hacker was a far more competent PM.

    ETA now I think about it, Francis Urquhart started out as Chief Whip. Be afraid, be very afraid...
  • Jim Hacker was a far more competent PM.

    You may think that. I couldn't possibly comment.

  • Jim Hacker was a far more competent PM.

    ETA now I think about it, Francis Urquhart started out as Chief Whip. Be afraid, be very afraid...

    Urquhart, for all his many sins, was at least competent.
  • A scary thought - I wonder if ConDom the Farsighted is taking Urquhart as his role model?
    :scream:
  • TelfordTelford Shipmate
    Telford wrote: »
    Boogie wrote: »
    Firenze wrote: »
    Given his references to his advanced age I'm going with the sclerosis of the intellect and emotions that can afflict the aged - hence the rigidity, lack of empathy and inability to actually discuss.

    I think, unless you discover a hitherto unnoticed benefit of hitting your head off a brick wall, you just scroll past.

    Fair points. But he seems to be active in so many discussions spreading his strange form of disordered opposition. Enough people take the bait for too much derailing to occur. It’s becoming tedious and annoying.

    Anything constructive to say ?

    Right back at ya.

    Ignored
    Boogie wrote: »
    @Telford said -
    Anything constructive to say ?

    Yes, I have.

    I want you to know that a lot of people are put off by your posting and are, like me, annoyed that you derail threads by making them all about you.

    I think that it’s constructive criticism to let you know that. It would also improve the Ship if you could see the problem and desisted.

    But I give up now, I will say no more on the subject.

    I wasn't refering to myself. I was refering to Mr Johnson
  • A scary thought - I wonder if ConDom the Farsighted is taking Urquhart as his role model?
    :scream:
    It's a pity he won't run into Sir Humphrey Appleby, Sir Humphrey will run rings around Dom without breaking a sweat, putting the young upstart in his place.

  • HugalHugal Shipmate
    Telford wrote: »
    Telford wrote: »
    Boogie wrote: »
    Firenze wrote: »
    Given his references to his advanced age I'm going with the sclerosis of the intellect and emotions that can afflict the aged - hence the rigidity, lack of empathy and inability to actually discuss.

    I think, unless you discover a hitherto unnoticed benefit of hitting your head off a brick wall, you just scroll past.

    Fair points. But he seems to be active in so many discussions spreading his strange form of disordered opposition. Enough people take the bait for too much derailing to occur. It’s becoming tedious and annoying.

    Anything constructive to say ?

    Right back at ya.

    Ignored
    Boogie wrote: »
    @Telford said -
    Anything constructive to say ?

    Yes, I have.

    I want you to know that a lot of people are put off by your posting and are, like me, annoyed that you derail threads by making them all about you.

    I think that it’s constructive criticism to let you know that. It would also improve the Ship if you could see the problem and desisted.

    But I give up now, I will say no more on the subject.

    I wasn't refering to myself. I was refering to Mr Johnson

    The thing is this Telford. Hell is about all the things you complain about. Ian not keen on punk music so don’t listen to it. If you find it horrible here then the best thing to do is not post. You must know the rules. If you keep on posting the way you do then people can only assume that as you know the rules you are being deliberately stupid.
    I said that in the nicest way I could. That is not in the spirit of Hell but there we go
  • TelfordTelford Shipmate
    Hugal wrote: »
    Telford wrote: »
    Telford wrote: »
    Boogie wrote: »
    Firenze wrote: »
    Given his references to his advanced age I'm going with the sclerosis of the intellect and emotions that can afflict the aged - hence the rigidity, lack of empathy and inability to actually discuss.

    I think, unless you discover a hitherto unnoticed benefit of hitting your head off a brick wall, you just scroll past.

    Fair points. But he seems to be active in so many discussions spreading his strange form of disordered opposition. Enough people take the bait for too much derailing to occur. It’s becoming tedious and annoying.

    Anything constructive to say ?

    Right back at ya.

    Ignored
    Boogie wrote: »
    @Telford said -
    Anything constructive to say ?

    Yes, I have.

    I want you to know that a lot of people are put off by your posting and are, like me, annoyed that you derail threads by making them all about you.

    I think that it’s constructive criticism to let you know that. It would also improve the Ship if you could see the problem and desisted.

    But I give up now, I will say no more on the subject.

    I wasn't refering to myself. I was refering to Mr Johnson

    The thing is this Telford. Hell is about all the things you complain about. Ian not keen on punk music so don’t listen to it. If you find it horrible here then the best thing to do is not post. You must know the rules. If you keep on posting the way you do then people can only assume that as you know the rules you are being deliberately stupid.
    I said that in the nicest way I could. That is not in the spirit of Hell but there we go

    Thanks for your post
  • Yes, but how will we know he's resigned? What difference will we notice?

    I guess we won't have so many opportunities to reach for the ulcer-quelling medication every time he appears on our screens?!

    This little gem popped into my mind when I read your question.

    'I wish I loved the human race
    I wish I loved its silly face
    I wish I liked the way it walks
    I wish I liked the way it talks
    And when I'm introduced to one
    I wish I thought "What jolly fun!"' (Raleigh)

    When Johnson was merely a third rate comic turn on HIGNFY game show it was a easy enough to laugh at him. Been a bit harder to appreciate his vanishingly slender talent to amuse since he was voted into power. I suppose his life is the fulfilment of that old joke about the trouble with political jokes is that they get elected.
  • the present confected outrage over the Last Night of the Proms consists of; I notice Johnson was quick to present himself to the press on this issue
    A comment on my Facebook feed this morning (actually about Nigel Farage who's been making similar outraged remarks, but works here): we want a journalist to interrupt a rant about the singing of Rule Britannia and/or the national anthem to ask him to sing it. What are the odds on him mumbling through because he doesn't know the words?
  • the present confected outrage over the Last Night of the Proms consists of; I notice Johnson was quick to present himself to the press on this issue
    A comment on my Facebook feed this morning (actually about Nigel Farage who's been making similar outraged remarks, but works here): we want a journalist to interrupt a rant about the singing of Rule Britannia and/or the national anthem to ask him to sing it. What are the odds on him mumbling through because he doesn't know the words?

    Very high.

    But this jingoistic nonsense carries far too much weight with some.
  • Cummings would issue a negative briefing about Sir Humphrey and he would have to go.
  • Hmm. Maybe he'd try , but Sir H would get round it somehow...and there'd be a superb one-liner from Bernard to finish the scene (and ConDom).
  • Just caught a clip of our exalted leader talking to school children on the radio...
    It was fantastic use of the passive voice... as though someone else was Prime Minister 2 weeks ago...

    AFZ
  • Bishops FingerBishops Finger Shipmate
    edited August 2020
    Well, that's true.

    It was ConDom the Farsighted...but he's been Crime Minister since Lord knows when...
    :grimace:

    The pale scarecrow they put on TV is actually a gebbeth (from Ursula le Guin's Earthsea) - a form of zombie, animated by Evil Spirits for Evil Purposes.
  • What does the man think he's doing - he should be in Downing Street facing up to his resonsibilities - not the least of which is Brexit.
  • The Lord Protector's latest excuse for incompetence is a classic - the exam results fiasco was caused by a mutant algorithm.

    One is tempted to believe that he, too, may be a mutation of something...
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