Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson

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  • I am both delighted and relieved that the Girl already has a job offer for when she finishes her PGCE, and at a decent inner city school.

    All she needs to do now is stop phoning me and the Boy up to ask us Physics questions, and she'll be fine.
  • Oh look, Gavin Williamson re-joins the fray in the attempt to make Mr Johnson look competent by stint of comparison to the rest of the Cabinet. Suggesting £6000 per school to hire additional teachers (plural!) to help children catch up. My maths may not be quite up to the level of Secretary of State for Education, but £6000 looks like less than 25% of the cost of hiring a single teacher.

    Probably thinking it'll go to an outsourcing agency to recruit volunteers!
  • DooneDoone Shipmate
    Oh look, Gavin Williamson re-joins the fray in the attempt to make Mr Johnson look competent by stint of comparison to the rest of the Cabinet. Suggesting £6000 per school to hire additional teachers (plural!) to help children catch up. My maths may not be quite up to the level of Secretary of State for Education, but £6000 looks like less than 25% of the cost of hiring a single teacher.

    Probably thinking it'll go to an outsourcing agency to recruit volunteers!

    Sadly, I think you’re right, going on what’s been done so far 😡! I’ve certainly read that it’s not going to schools to do what’s best for their children. Also, no mention, as far as I can see, of considering social, emotional and mental health issues, etc.
  • EnochEnoch Shipmate
    Doc Tor wrote: »
    I am both delighted and relieved that the Girl already has a job offer for when she finishes her PGCE, and at a decent inner city school.

    All she needs to do now is stop phoning me and the Boy up to ask us Physics questions, and she'll be fine.
    Is she going to be teaching Physics? If so, I shouldn't be too optimistic about that.

  • Enoch wrote: »
    Doc Tor wrote: »
    I am both delighted and relieved that the Girl already has a job offer for when she finishes her PGCE, and at a decent inner city school.

    All she needs to do now is stop phoning me and the Boy up to ask us Physics questions, and she'll be fine.
    Is she going to be teaching Physics? If so, I shouldn't be too optimistic about that.

    Well, quite. I've told her that "I'm just going to call my dad", while effective, is not the best example of pedagogy.
  • KarlLBKarlLB Shipmate
    I shouldn't worry. They're that short of physics teachers that knowing why astrology is a pile of bollocks would put a candidate in a strong position.
  • Hallo, I can tell somebody with Taurus ruled by Venus.
  • Looking at the payscales, that's a fifth of someone 3 points in. (So with a couple of years experience.) Assuming that the salary just covers 39 weeks teaching (which isn't true), that is just shy of 8 weeks worth of teaching time, so 4 teachers if you set up a 2 week summer school, assuming using current staff so no recruitment costs. Not really enough, even assuming that a school just focuses on maths and english lessons for people who need it.
  • KarlLBKarlLB Shipmate
    edited February 24
    Hallo, I can tell somebody with Taurus ruled by Venus.

    You mean they're compelled to love bullshit?
  • KarlLB wrote: »
    I shouldn't worry. They're that short of physics teachers that knowing why astrology is a pile of bollocks would put a candidate in a strong position.

    Back in my student days, we had a supplier write to us at the "Department of Physics and Astrology". In retrospect, that should have been more of a sign of the quality and attention to detail we should have expected from that particular company.
  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    If it was good enough for Isaac Newton...
  • Back in the world of Very Important Matters, it seems as though the current First Lady has overspent a bit on the wallpaper etc. for the refurbishment of the love-nest shared by herself and Bozzie:

    https://theguardian.com/politics/2021/mar/02/johnson-trying-to-set-up-charity-that-could-fund-downing-street-flat-revamp

    A Guardian reader reckoned this was a good idea, and that he was going to set up a JustGiving page at justfuckoffborisyoutwat.co.uk (or words to that effect).
    :naughty:
  • EnochEnoch Shipmate
    It's difficult to avoid the suspicion that this is a cunning plan to enable people to get tax relief on their bribes.

  • Enoch wrote: »
    It's difficult to avoid the suspicion that this is a cunning plan to enable people to get tax relief on their bribes.

    Not suspicion. Fact. Even if it doesn't meet the legal standard for such. It is unavoidably a means of inciting donations effectively to an individual - i.e. not even a political cause - in return for what exactly? The warm fuzzy feeling of knowing that Boris has nice wallpaper?

    Really?
  • Bung a Bob to Brighten the Boudoir of Bozzie's Bird!

    Who could resist?

    I think I might have a spare Dandiprat* somewhere - that would seem to be appropriate as a donation...

    (*early 16thC coin worth about three halfpence.)
  • chrisstileschrisstiles Shipmate
    Bung a Bob to Brighten the Boudoir of Bozzie's Bird!

    Meanwhile this is only marginally less North Korean than the earlier Sunak as Superman feature: https://twitter.com/BBCPolitics/status/1367059443939225602
  • Bung a Bob to Brighten the Boudoir of Bozzie's Bird!

    Meanwhile this is only marginally less North Korean than the earlier Sunak as Superman feature: https://twitter.com/BBCPolitics/status/1367059443939225602

    :open_mouth:

    Goodness me - we're definitely in the (wrong) parallel universe!
  • KarlLBKarlLB Shipmate
    edited March 23
    Johnson spekes his branes, before remembering someone might hear him and acting like a cat trying to claw the soiled carpet into the litter tray: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-56504546
  • KarlLB wrote: »
    Johnson spekes his branes, before remembering someone might hear him and acting like a cat trying to claw the soiled carpet into the litter tray: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-56504546

    How many times does Johnson have to show his true colours before people see through him???

    How long, O Lord, how long?

    AFZ
  • AnselminaAnselmina Shipmate
    KarlLB wrote: »
    Johnson spekes his branes, before remembering someone might hear him and acting like a cat trying to claw the soiled carpet into the litter tray: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-56504546

    How many times does Johnson have to show his true colours before people see through him???

    How long, O Lord, how long?

    AFZ

    It's my impression that far from seeing through Johnson, it's more a case of him simply articulating what his supporters believe. Whether it's Muslim 'women looking like pillar boxes' or 'picaninnies' with 'water-melon smiles' or 'capitalism and greed' keeping the UK ahead of other nations in the vaccine programme - he's just saying what his supporters already think. That's WHY they support him. Johnson's true colours have always been flying high and visible since he was a crap journo in the EU inventing stories about the Union. It's not news that Johnson says these things. It's only news that so many people apparently agree with him, approve of it and then vote for it.
  • Indeed.

    Kyrie, eleison...Lord, have mercy...

    Bozzie the Bumblewimp is the True Spirit of Ingurlaaaand™, which is why this wretched country is so rapidly heading down the lavatory...
  • Anselmina wrote: »
    KarlLB wrote: »
    Johnson spekes his branes, before remembering someone might hear him and acting like a cat trying to claw the soiled carpet into the litter tray: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-56504546

    How many times does Johnson have to show his true colours before people see through him???

    How long, O Lord, how long?

    AFZ

    It's my impression that far from seeing through Johnson, it's more a case of him simply articulating what his supporters believe. Whether it's Muslim 'women looking like pillar boxes' or 'picaninnies' with 'water-melon smiles' or 'capitalism and greed' keeping the UK ahead of other nations in the vaccine programme - he's just saying what his supporters already think. That's WHY they support him. Johnson's true colours have always been flying high and visible since he was a crap journo in the EU inventing stories about the Union. It's not news that Johnson says these things. It's only news that so many people apparently agree with him, approve of it and then vote for it.

    Yes and no.

    I think his political 'genius' is that he appeals to those who agree with him and those who would actually be horrified by what he actually stands for if they were not too busy lying to themselves to be able to see it. Neither of those groups is probably bigger than about 20% but the coalition of both is a guaranteed route to power in the UK.
  • Boris managed to forget the name of the leader of the Scottish Tories in Parliament today.
  • Once again proving himself to be the greatest advocate for Scottish independence each time he opens his mouth.
  • HugalHugal Shipmate
    Just catching up. Boris just opens his mouth and says the first thing that comes to mind. That are we not due an election yet?
  • Hugal wrote: »
    Just catching up. Boris just opens his mouth and says the first thing that comes to mind. That are we not due an election yet?

    I notice the Beeb are quite over the Acuri story. To the point of not covering the Mirror on their 'Papers' section of Marr's show.
  • I mean, Boris Johnson is promiscuous is not really news is it - is there anyone in the country that doesn't already know that ?
  • I mean, Boris Johnson is promiscuous is not really news is it - is there anyone in the country that doesn't already know that ?

    No. But the level of corruption in plain site should be news...
  • I mean, Boris Johnson is promiscuous is not really news is it - is there anyone in the country that doesn't already know that ?

    Not really, but an omission on a section that normally covers all the front pages. Though I assume it'll turn out to be just another of those very strategic mistakes.

    It's interesting that the UK is gradually moving from a country with a reputation - at least - for probity, to one where 'everyone knows' something, but the public broadcaster doesn't report on it.
  • PendragonPendragon Shipmate
    Sounds like the programme editor is taking his cues from the Edward VIII playbook. (The rest of the world knew about Mrs Wallis Simpson long before the UK press deigned to enlighten the British public.)
  • It's worse than just an affair, it's the Downing Street Press Officer,
    PM press sec Allegra Stratton says of Boris Johnson: "He does believe in the wider principles of integrity and honesty.

    "He acts with integrity and honesty and he follows the Nolan principles when conducting himself in public life".
    In the face of allegations of a four year affair and public funding of Jennifer Acuri's business with grants during the time of the affair. - link to Independent coverage.

    This really should be covered by the BBC and I haven't heard it covered on several radio news programmes today (which tend to be a bit better than TV).
  • EirenistEirenist Shipmate
    Sounds as if the Beeb is trying to keep its licence fee safe.
  • EirenistEirenist Shipmate
    At his appearance in the new press conference studio yesterday, Boris still looked both quite ill and faintly ridiculous, dwarfed by the giant Union Flags which his government currently insists on displaying at every opportunity.
  • Eirenist wrote: »
    Sounds as if the Beeb is trying to keep its licence fee safe.

    We've got to the point where we expect that corruption involving the current governing party won't be covered on the public (should that be state?) broadcaster and most of the print press.
  • Jane RJane R Shipmate
    Somebody must have complained; the missing front page has been added.
  • I wish someone would get him a haircut, failing that brush it before he goes in front of the camers.

    Other than that: get a suit that fits, shine his shoes and FFS stand up straight, don't hunch over the lectern like a wilting crane.
  • Hair cut is a non-issue as no hairdressers open in England until 12 April, if we are still on track. Johnson has said in one of his conferences that he's looking forward to a hair cut. And if he'd had one when no-one else is allowed, that would be taken up by the tabloids too.
  • I've been trimming my hair at home myself, struggling in front of a mirror to see what I'm doing, and haven't been to a barbers shop for well over a year. And, my hair looks much better than his.

    Though, I also use a comb.
  • Bishops FingerBishops Finger Shipmate
    edited March 30
    Surely, he deliberately tousles his haystack hair before he appears on TV, so as to give himself that boyish, raffish *Just William* look we all love so much?

    There must still be a True-Blue British Hair Cream that he could use to glue it down.

    TBH, hair or not, the very sight of his ugly mug turns my stomach...and that's before he opens his gob in order to spout more Hideous Fibs.
  • EirenistEirenist Shipmate
    The new decor doesn't really help.
  • Bishops FingerBishops Finger Shipmate
    edited March 30
    Apparently, the Union Flag just loves the feeling of being wrapped around the PM...

    There's no accounting for taste.
  • AnselminaAnselmina Shipmate
    Hair cut is a non-issue as no hairdressers open in England until 12 April, if we are still on track. Johnson has said in one of his conferences that he's looking forward to a hair cut. And if he'd had one when no-one else is allowed, that would be taken up by the tabloids too.

    He could use clippers, or those special stripping bladed combs mothers used to use in the seventies for cutting their kids hair (yes, I was one of those kids and have the photos to prove it!). I'm sure his current live-in girlfriend could help out, maybe follow a youtube tutorial. Many of us are managing not to look entirely like we don't know what a comb is. Hair 'product' is also a wonderful thing. Again the current squeeze might share some tips about self-grooming? She's a very smart-looking woman.

    But as Bishop's Finger says it is on record that before any public appearance Johnson runs his hands through his hair to tousle it up in its signature fashion. Must get the priorities right.

    To be honest, I wouldn't care what he looked like if I felt he could be trusted to conscientiously discharge the duties of Prime Minister to the best of his abilities. Even if those abilities were limited or flawed. I wouldn't even care about the odd mistake, bad decision or stupid joke. I could even (controversial!) forgive him being a Tory, if he was only relatively capable, wise, principled and reliable. Kind of the baseline requisites for anyone who runs a nation, if you would like that nation to prosper.
  • EnochEnoch Shipmate
    Apparently, the Union Flag just loves the feeling of being wrapped around the PM...
    @Bishops Finger I so wish there was a like button.

  • Bishops FingerBishops Finger Shipmate
    edited March 30
    :grimace:
  • Orbanism it is.
  • EirenistEirenist Shipmate
    Well, the politics of paranoia have taken over again in Northern Ireland (if indeed they ever went away), as ayone but our old mate Bozza could have foreseen. But he's a laugh, isn't he?
  • Pick one of three:

    Border in the Irish Sea.
    Border between NI and Ireland.
    Customs union.

    Those were the choices, only one of which is congruent with the Good Friday Agreement.
  • Doc Tor wrote: »
    Pick one of three:

    Border in the Irish Sea.
    Border between NI and Ireland.
    Customs union.

    Those were the choices, only one of which is congruent with the Good Friday Agreement.

    It's the simple logic here that's been consistently ignored and waved away.

    "Boris" now has to face reality rather than the nonsense of 'bothsiderism.'

    As with Covid, reality is unforgiving. As with Covid, it is others who pay the price. And the price is very high.

    AFZ
  • BoogieBoogie Shipmate
    edited April 22
    “Boris Johnson may be questioned by senior MPs on use of personal phone, liaison committee to discuss issue amid concerns about PM’s undisclosed communications.”

    Cue lots of text and WhatsApp deleting as we speak.
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