Valentine Despair

Curiosity killedCuriosity killed Shipmate, 8th Day Host
For those people not in happy coupledom, does the sight of all those red hearts make you despair? What tips and advice can you share?

I'm currently eyeing up the heart shaped biscuit cutters on sale, hoping that in just over a week, I may be able to snaffle some at half price. I lost all my cutters last year and so far have replaced a few Christmas themed cutters in January.
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Comments

  • RossweisseRossweisse Shipmate, 8th Day Host
    The only time it does is when my very-ex-husband insists on sending along a heart-shaped box of chocolates via one of our daughters. I really don't want them, and I'm no longer able to take them to my office for others to scarf up.

  • Amanda B ReckondwythAmanda B Reckondwyth Mystery Worship Editor
    I feel somewhat down on Valentine's Day and avoid going out, especially for dinner. A piece of cake usually cheers me up somewhat, but I'm glad when the day is over.
  • A Feminine ForceA Feminine Force Shipmate
    edited February 7
    Rossweisse wrote: »
    The only time it does is when my very-ex-husband insists on sending along a heart-shaped box of chocolates via one of our daughters. I really don't want them, and I'm no longer able to take them to my office for others to scarf up.

    Here's one for you, Rossweisse.

    The El Paso Zoo is running a "Quit Bugging Me" campaign for Valentine's day, wherein you may contact them by Facebook and have them name a cocroach after your ex. On Valentine's Day, the cockroach will be fed to one of their meerkats as a snack on FB Live.

    https://www.facebook.com/elpasozoo/photos/a.482518977621/10156975620942622/?type=3&theater

    Thank God for the internet. I never would have known this was possible.

    AFF
  • Thank you for posting that AFF, one cockroach is now named after the scum i was married to
  • NicoleMRNicoleMR Shipmate
    The Bronx Zoo names cockroaches after people by request too. I don't think they feed them to anything though.
  • Naming a cockroach after my ex would be an insult to cockroaches.
  • balaambalaam Shipmate, 8th Day Host
    As someone in a relationship, I do not despair at the red hearts.

    I do despair at the M&S Love Sausage though. What were they thinking?
  • finelinefineline Purgatory Host
    I view it the same way I view Hallowe’en - of no interest to me in itself, but fun reduced-price novelty sweets after the event. I’d even get myself the heart sausage if it was reduced to 50p. Maybe they’ll have some heart shape crisps too.
  • balaam wrote: »
    I do despair at the M&S Love Sausage though. What were they thinking?
    To gently hasten the loved one's demise through obesity and excessive consumption of cholesterol?

  • Thankfully I don’t despair on Valentine’s Day, I just get ready to pounce on down-priced chocolates and flowers In the days afterwards. Sometimes I don’t even wait - I’m worth it.
  • balaam wrote: »
    I do despair at the M&S Love Sausage though. What were they thinking?

    That's not what I'd think of first when love sausage is mentioned!

    AG
    (mind like a sewer)

  • balaam wrote: »
    I do despair at the M&S Love Sausage though. What were they thinking?

    That's not what I'd think of first when love sausage is mentioned!

    AG
    (mind like a sewer)

    Mine is in the same place. The fact that they come in oppositely bending pairs doesn't help any.
  • balaambalaam Shipmate, 8th Day Host
    That is exactly where my mind was when I posted it. I'm surprised it took so long for people to catch on.

    You all must be saints compared to me.
  • finelinefineline Purgatory Host
    I assumed it was deliberate double entendre on the part of M&S, for humour purposes.
  • DoublethinkDoublethink Shipmate
    edited February 8
    I now feel a previously unexperienced need to possess and consume a love sausage.
  • Curiosity killedCuriosity killed Shipmate, 8th Day Host
    edited February 8
    I meant to see if love sausages were in stock today in the local M&S. And I also assumed that they were a deliberate double entendre. But it's so much more entertaining than pint schooners with "I love you more than beer" inscribed in red lettering, which are part of the offering at Tesco.
  • That's just.... well, tawdry.

    AG
  • In what way is offering to fry one's beloved's love sausage in hot fat supposed to be romantic? Let alone the bit where you take a sharp knife to it?

  • balaambalaam Shipmate, 8th Day Host
    In what way is offering to fry one's beloved's love sausage in hot fat supposed to be romantic? Let alone the bit where you take a sharp knife to it?

    **Shiver**
  • NenyaNenya Shipmate
    Mr Nen and I are long term marrieds and for most of that time have done an annual exchange of, "We don't do Valentines, do we?" "Nah." This Thursday evening we are both out, though not with each other.

    And I know it is overrated, overpriced, overcommercialised. But there's a bit of me that wishes he would surprise me with a dozen red roses and a card with red hearts on it and soppy words inside. Because I'm worth it. :wink:
  • BoogieBoogie Shipmate
    edited February 9
    @Nenya said -
    Mr Nen and I are long term marrieds and for most of that time have done an annual exchange of, "We don't do Valentines, do we?" "Nah." This Thursday evening we are both out, though not with each other.
    This
    And I know it is overrated, overpriced, overcommercialised. But there's a bit of me that wishes he would surprise me with a dozen red roses and a card with red hearts on it and soppy words inside. Because I'm worth it. :wink:
    But not this.

    I’d rather be given roses (yellow) as a surprise on a random day.

    A bit like Mother’s Day - Valentine’s Day seems false and forced to me. We’ve never bothered with it.

  • finelinefineline Purgatory Host
    See, that's how I interpret the reasoning behind silly things like a love sausage. Lots of couples don't take Valentine's day terribly seriously, and would rather have a silly thing they can laugh at. And it gets away from all the stereotypical things society decides are romantic - in the same way that society has determined a particular day for romance, it has also determined certain things, like roses, to be a symbol of one's love/romance.
  • Laugh at my love sausage all you like, fineline!

    I'll get me coat... because actually that's decent point.

    AG
  • RossweisseRossweisse Shipmate, 8th Day Host
    ...The El Paso Zoo is running a "Quit Bugging Me" campaign for Valentine's day, wherein you may contact them by Facebook and have them name a cocroach after your ex. On Valentine's Day, the cockroach will be fed to one of their meerkats as a snack on FB Live.

    https://www.facebook.com/elpasozoo/photos/a.482518977621/10156975620942622/?type=3&theater ...
    I saw that, and was sore tempted. So far I've resisted.


  • If you haven't seen this yet you might enjoy it. From our friends at Brigham Young University (don't laugh, it's funny), an hilarious sketch on how Valentine's Day was created by an evil scientist.
  • NenyaNenya Shipmate
    Boogie wrote: »
    @Nenya said -
    Mr Nen and I are long term marrieds and for most of that time have done an annual exchange of, "We don't do Valentines, do we?" "Nah." This Thursday evening we are both out, though not with each other.
    This
    And I know it is overrated, overpriced, overcommercialised. But there's a bit of me that wishes he would surprise me with a dozen red roses and a card with red hearts on it and soppy words inside. Because I'm worth it. :wink:
    But not this.

    I’d rather be given roses (yellow) as a surprise on a random day.

    I'd like both-and. :wink:
  • I was married for over 25 years before I came to my senses. I got flowers for Valentine's Day once -- wilted, white chrysanthemums, because that's all the flower stand on the corner had left by dinner time. (Also no candy, dinner out, etc. etc. on any other Valentine's Day.)

  • We go out to eat as a family, and we do it the day before or after. That horrifies certain interested spectators (relatives), who think Mr. Lamb and I should be enacting some sort of Romantic Date™. But that wouldn't be half as real or as fun for us, our family, the real us (as opposed to the wholly imaginary couple our relatives think we ought to be).

    The truth is, we're fuddy duddies. And we like being fuddy duddies. Suck it up.
  • A couple of years ago a male friend (just a friend) and I were going to a concert on February 14 and wanted to eat a quick meal on the way there. Do you know how awkward that is on February 14? First of all, almost every restaurant is booked solid (luckily we were eating a bit early so we could get to the concert). Then, of course, everyone assumes it's a romantic meal. It was almost embarrassing.

    A few years before that, I had volunteered to help at a charity event that was held on February 14 (why they chose that date I don't know). I showed up, and after I waited around for a while, getting increasingly annoyed, it turned out they didn't need me. There I was all gussied up and nowhere to go. Any other night of the year I would have stopped at a nice restaurant and treated myself to dinner on the way home.

    So this year -- it's me and my dental appointment. That's it!
  • BoogieBoogie Shipmate
    I didn’t know about this - forced valentine giving in Japan.

    😳😵
  • I've never turned up at a restaurant, hoping to eat, on Valentine's Day. But we have sought an ad hoc lunch on Mothering Sunday: hopeless!
  • Curiosity killedCuriosity killed Shipmate, 8th Day Host
    Another problem with eating out on Valentine's Day is that everything is geared towards the romantic evening type of meal - with prices hiked to match - to pay for the red napkins, candles, complimentary chocolate, rose for the girl and all.
  • finelinefineline Purgatory Host
    I went (by myself) to Starbucks on Valentine's Day once, not even realising it was Valentine's Day, just wanting a cappuccino, and I got a complimentary chocolate with it, no extra price, just because it was Valentine's Day. So there are perks to Valentine's Day too.
  • And did they doodle a little heart in cocoa powder on top of the froth?

  • finelinefineline Purgatory Host
    Ha, no. You do your own sprinkles in Starbucks. Costa do that though - they have a heart stencil, not just for Valentine's day, as well as a star one and a frog one. I always ask for the frog. (I know far too much about the cappuccino conventions of each coffee shop!)
  • Well, the coffee's better in Costa, anyway.
  • RuthRuth Admin Emeritus
    Eating out alone or with a friend on Valentine's Day is easy where I live. Go to a diner or a bar and grill - basically anywhere that doesn't take reservations.
  • PuzzlerPuzzler Shipmate
    I was taken out to lunch by my son today as this is the one day we both happened to be free for a long time. It just so happens to be Valentine’s Day but the pub’s special treats do not start till evening. Ok by me. I can always find some chocolate in the fridge.

    I won’t be going out tonight as my other half is away. Nor will my son as he and his wife have just returned from a romantic holiday sans kids.
    We don’t do Valentines anyway.
  • anoesisanoesis Shipmate
    Valentines passed unmarked in our household. This is about what I expected, seeing as, very early on in our courtship, my highly intelligent spouse informed me that he was woke enough to see through all the marketing hype, and that he was sure that I, being a sensible woman, would prefer to receive tokens of appreciation, et al, from him, when he wanted to give them to me, rather than when a box on a calendar prompted him to do so.

    Sadly, in twenty-four years of supposedly romantic exclusive attachment one to another, the spirit has so moved him on, I think, six occasions. Okay, so it's not a competition, but I have bought that man more bottles of single malt scotch than he's bought me...anything...I might like to have*...

    I suspect that a further problem lies with the fact that I am regarded as being a sensible woman, and as such am held to have the same perspective as himself on the utility of such things as bunches of flowers** - I mean, they just die anyway, so what's the point?

    What, indeed, is the point? There sure isn't any point in trying to get him to change...

    Anoesis, who is middle-aged and sad.

    ----

    *He did buy me a lego set, once, to my initial bafflement. But then, he enjoys lego.
    **My clear attachment to flowers can be noted anytime you look out the windows of my house - but then, perhaps I don't need any more, because I'm already growing them?...
  • Maybe you should just TELL him, since he's apparently clueless and can't see a hint a mile wide. I had to do this in extremely blunt fashion with Mr. Lamb before he got the point. Embarrassing, but better than letting him blunder onward while I got mad/sad/cranky. He stepped up once I told him in no uncertain terms.
  • I was told at 7pm that chocolates were required.

    I enjoyed the walk to W++tr+se.
  • Pigwidgeon wrote: »
    Naming a cockroach after my ex would be an insult to cockroaches.

    When my daughter was little, I often felt obligated to purchase gifts for her to give my ex/ her father on his birthday, Father's Day, Christmas. I was always drawn to Heifer Project, where you can give livestock to a family in the developing world as an alternate gift for someone. The ones I considered were: a turkey, a boar, or half a donkey...
  • Which half?
  • Maybe you should just TELL him, since he's apparently clueless and can't see a hint a mile wide. I had to do this in extremely blunt fashion with Mr. Lamb before he got the point. Embarrassing, but better than letting him blunder onward while I got mad/sad/cranky. He stepped up once I told him in no uncertain terms.

    This simple expedient -- of not expecting one's husband to read one's mind, but saying openly what one wants -- could be so beneficial to so many marriages.
  • RossweisseRossweisse Shipmate, 8th Day Host
    mousethief wrote: »
    This simple expedient -- of not expecting one's husband to read one's mind, but saying openly what one wants -- could be so beneficial to so many marriages.
    ...when one's husband can bring himself to hear...


  • Rossweisse wrote: »
    mousethief wrote: »
    This simple expedient -- of not expecting one's husband to read one's mind, but saying openly what one wants -- could be so beneficial to so many marriages.
    ...when one's husband can bring himself to hear...

    That's a whole nother question, of course. This hearkens back to the whole thing about women thinking they can change men and men thinking women will never change, and both being disappointed. But if your man won't take a hint, AND won't listen when you actually come out and say it, perhaps your marriage is on rocky ground. (Generic "you".)
  • anoesisanoesis Shipmate
    mousethief wrote: »
    Maybe you should just TELL him, since he's apparently clueless and can't see a hint a mile wide. I had to do this in extremely blunt fashion with Mr. Lamb before he got the point. Embarrassing, but better than letting him blunder onward while I got mad/sad/cranky. He stepped up once I told him in no uncertain terms.

    This simple expedient -- of not expecting one's husband to read one's mind, but saying openly what one wants -- could be so beneficial to so many marriages.

    Believe me, I have learned that it is not sufficient to ask "Could you please bring the washing in?" - it is necessary to say "Could you please bring the washing in, sort it, fold it up, and put the piles into the relevant bedrooms?" - as the first request leads to a pile of clean washing being dumped upon the nearest horizontal surface inside the door.

    In this instance, though, what one wants is not so much to have one's mind read, as to be noticed from time to time, independently of his needing something from me, and without having to jump up and down waving one's arms and shrieking - without having to already be in meltdown territory.
  • Did he used to do that?
  • Amanda B ReckondwythAmanda B Reckondwyth Mystery Worship Editor
    anoesis wrote: »
    what one wants is not so much to have one's mind read, as to be noticed from time to time

    You need to wear ribbons down your back.
  • anoesisanoesis Shipmate
    With the washing? Yes.
    Or with the noticing? Hm. Well, he asked me out, and asked me to be his girlfriend, and asked me to marry him. And then, yeah.

    (I do see what you're getting at, here, btw - if he's always been like that it's unreasonable for me to expect anything else, because men can't change). However, if two people are going to make a shared life, istm neither of them can expect not be changed by the experience - but as long as people are peddling this sort of John Gray horseshit, half the population has a ready-made excuse for ensuring that the majority of the accommodating will continue to be done by the other half.
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