Haiku

This discussion was created from comments split from: Limerick.

Comments

  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    Tangent:

    I’m on Day 23 (‘NaPoWriMo2022) and the sound
    Of my poetical efforts profound
    Writing haiku, Shadorma, Cento, Cinquain and Glosa
    The next Poet Laureate’s found.😁
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    edited April 2022
    As Haiku are forms of poetic expressions in their own right, I have split Miffy's tangential Haiku off from the Limerick thread, so that they may have their own, distinct expression.

    Rules: I am posting a link to the Wiki's Haiku in English page, which prospective, budding poets might find of interest. Typical characteristics are, according to that Wiki page:
    Some additional traits are especially associated with English-language haiku (as opposed to Japanese-language haiku):
    • a three-line format with 17 syllables arranged in a 5–7–5 pattern. However, many contemporary haiku poets work in poems containing 10 to 14 syllables, which more nearly approximates the duration of a Japanese haiku. Usually, the second line is the longest. Some poets want their haiku to be expressed in one breath.
    • little or no punctuation or capitalization, except that cuts are sometimes marked with dashes or ellipses and proper nouns are usually capitalized

    For further typical themes and stylistic points, I refer the poetically minded to the link above. I hope that will help. If anyone is aware of better instructions, feel free to let us know.

    (The rules seem less clear and less stringent for a Haiku than for a Limerick, but purists may disagree.)

    Have fun! :)

    Wesley J, Circus Host
  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    From limerick to
    haiku we sail on smoothly
    Don’t lower the tone!
  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    But this is The Ship
    the level of intellect
    inspiring great works
  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    OK… here we go:

    In Heaven’s portals
    a host creeps, incognito
    ………………………….(fill in line, 5 syllables)
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    edited April 2022
    In Heaven’s portals
    a host creeps, incognito
    deeming threads Hellbound



  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    edited April 2022
    By the way, just to add to the earlier explanation, but I think the common structure for a haiku is that the first line sets up a static sort of scene, the second line describes something happening in the scene, and the third describes the sensations resulting from the occurence in the second line.

    For example, the old classic(rendered into my own words for copyright reasons)...

    Ancient forest pond
    In hops a frog suddenly
    Quiet splashing sound


    Not that I'm saying everyone has to follow this template, just that it is part of the classic template.
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    Sorry, I didn't mean to repeat the word "template" there. After decades of making that particular mistake, I should know now not to take a break from writing in the middle of a sentence.
  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    Well, you can’t get more static than Heaven!
  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    New to The Circus
    Haiku thread spells happiness
    Sweet sounds of snoring
  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    Hell freezes over…
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    edited April 2022
    Hell freezes over
    Lucifer's imps bundle up
  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    stetson wrote: »
    Hell freezes over
    Lucifer's imps bundle up

    Hell is very quiet

  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    I don’t feel these have the same ’robustness’ as the limerick.
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    Unadorned haiku
    Bunny pines for robustness
    Cue unfulfillment
  • HarryCHHarryCH Shipmate
    As I understand it, a classic haiku must have a reference (often subtle) to the season.
  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    stetson wrote: »
    Unadorned haiku
    Bunny pines for robustness
    Cue unfulfillment
    HarryCH wrote: »
    As I understand it, a classic haiku must have a reference (often subtle) to the season.

    Well said.🙂

    Bunny has shades of
    Flowers, Springtime and Easter eggs
    Cue chocolate orgy

  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    A train setting off
    Gliding out of the platform
    …………..,
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    A train setting off
    Gliding out of the platform
    Smooth metallic hum


  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    Skyscrapers at night
    Light snowfall touches the glass...
  • Stetson, those are good ones, as a good haiku is not just a matter of counting syllables, but delivering a fresh perception, sometimes discordantly. Thus Basho's old pond haiku, "old pond/frog leaps in/water's sound", (various translations), makes us jump from perception to perception. See also Hokusai's haiku, "I write, erase, rewrite/erase again/and then a poppy blooms".
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    Stetson, those are good ones

    Thanks!

    FWIW, Allen Ginsberg did a bluegrass tune based on the "old pond" haiku back in the 80s. You can find it on YouTube: "Allen Ginsberg old pond".

  • "The apparition of these faces in a crowd
    Petals on a wet black bough".

    Ezra Pound.
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    "The apparition of these faces in a crowd
    Petals on a wet black bough".

    Ezra Pound.

    And, of course, William Carlos Williams and his plums in the ice box. Not technically a haiku, but in the same overall spirit.
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