Going Viral - Crown Him with many Crowns (Pandemonium!)

Wesley JWesley J Shipmate
edited March 14 in All Saints
I thought we could use a bit of fun or distraction in these increasingly difficult times of the current virus pandemic, but also some kind and caring, mutual support for those of us on the Ship who are rather p***ed off by the whole situation, like myself.

This is not a medical support thread, although some common sense suggestions might find their way on here, as might some common or uncommon experiences and encounters in these very strange times; a common sense and commonwealth of humour may also help. May it prevail.

For a start, and to help us keep an eye on the graveness of the situation, here is a link (click) from Johns Hopkins University, Baltimore, USA. They give us an up-to-date map of the spread not of Marmite (or Vegemite), I'm afraid, but of aforementioned microscopic nasty. A link to a mobile version is at the bottom of that page.

The thread title of course is intended to be somewhat punny, but I also think that the hymn can have some deep meaning for us, should we momentarily despair. If Christ has worn and carried the crown of thorns, He will also wear the many more crowns of our needs and deep sorrows. This may be of comfort to some. The world may be quite a different one once we're through this. It may be a rather nastier one in some respects, and perhaps in others a nicer one. But Christ is still King.

Let the mulling over commence!

(And if you mention that god-awful 'Mull of Kintyre' song, believe me, I will cough at you from a close distance!!)
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Comments

  • BoogieBoogie Shipmate
    Thanks @Wesley J - a timely thread. We will all have our concerns as this continues to build.

    🕯
  • Wesley JWesley J Shipmate
    Indeed. Let's not forget that we're not quite dead yet!
  • Raptor EyeRaptor Eye Shipmate
    Thank you @Wesley J and @Doublethink

    Ha ha, I love it!

    The Italians might be singing their way through it, while the Brits will be laughing. The jokes on social media are coming thick and fast.
  • Good article in the New York Times. Never mind the bog roll - stock up the booze! https://www.nytimes.com/2020/03/13/us/coronavirus-alcohol-sales.html. New Yorkers always get their priorities right.

    But why are people buying masses of bottled water? Last I heard, the virus wasn't coming out of the taps.
  • Wesley JWesley J Shipmate
    edited March 14
    I reckon it's a 'while we're at it', so you get anything imaginable or even unimaginable while you're there, just to feel safe or to 'have done something'/anything.

    To be frank, why people stock up on bog rolls is beyond me. Except - and that is a thought! - they may need loads of it, should they stuff themselves with the tonnes of food they now buy, and which will undoubtedly contribute to more frequent journeys to the throne (to stay with the royal theme of the threat).

    I believe most of us will survive the next few weeks and months, ... but we will be incredibly fat from all that food we've eaten. You know, eat as much as you can, as long as you've still got any food. (You now have plenty!)

    I suspect we may all become as spherical and globe-al as the virus itself!
  • PigwidgeonPigwidgeon Shipmate
    Wesley J wrote: »
    I suspect we may all become as spherical and globe-al as the virus itself!

    "No longer from head to foot than from hip to hip: she is spherical, like a globe; I could find out countries in her." (Dromio of Syracuse, in The Comedy of Errors :smile:

    I actually would suspect the opposite -- if we don't know when grocery store shelves will be restocked, or whether we'll be too sick to get to the stores in another week or two -- I would imagine that people will ration whatever food they have on hand.
  • Tree BeeTree Bee Shipmate
    I’m thinking there’s going to be a world wide baby boom around Christmas time.
  • HuiaHuia Shipmate
    If I were at any probability of childbearing my, first preparation would be a long-term contraceptive.

    As it is I'm picking up a repeat prescription of my old person medication.
  • MooMoo Kerygmania Host
    But why are people buying masses of bottled water? Last I heard, the virus wasn't coming out of the taps.

    I agree it's silly for people to buy bottled water when they have a public water supply. When I lived in New Hampshire, my water came from my private well., and when there was no power, the well pump didn't work.

    However power failures were usually predictable--storm forecasts. I had two gallon pitchers with lids, and I filled them before the storm hit. (I also filled the bathtub with water so I could wash myself and flush the toilet.) After two days I started buying bottled water because I wasn't sure how long the water in the pitchers would stay fresh.

  • Wesley JWesley J Shipmate
    Thanks, Doublethink! :) I've actually been to Spamalot, and with some Shipmates, a few years back - but I don't remember this particulat scene!
    Tree Bee wrote: »
    I’m thinking there’s going to be a world wide baby boom around Christmas time.
    Because people make condoms out of bog paper, of which they have aplenty, as they forgot to buy the real thing? - Ok, on second thoughts, perhaps not a mental (sic!) image one will want to dwell on.

    Moving swiftly on.
    The authorities in Continental WesShire have closed down all schools, and banned all gatherings of more than a certain number of people, not quite sure how many right now. The situation is constantly evolving, as you may know from wherever you live yourselves. Parts of the country have gone further, with restaurants, bar and café curfews at I think 10pm. Other parts are even shutting down all shops (!), except for grocery shopping, pharmacies and petrol stations. So no more shopping for clothes, no more haircuts at hairdressers, and similar pastimes. - I may have to hie myself soon to my hairdresser's, lest we'll have the 1970s hippie long-haired look again before spring is over...!

    School closures here may be extended to July, which is the end of term, some now say. This is dull, as I work in the education sector and rather like it. I don't think many educational institutions here are ready yet for much e-teaching and e-learning, although we're preparing - and it might actually be fun to do so. Not being able to actually physically meet your students and your colleagues however, that is going to be rubbish. But we'll see.

    How congregations will cope with church closures (which are already happening due to ever stricter sanitary requirements) remains to be seen. And as we're supposed to use less of public transport, if ever possible - which is advice, not law yet - many may be more or less stuck where they are, at home.

    I hope we can revive some of the Blitz spirit, and transfer it over here, but without the doodlebugs! Which reminds me of a cartoon in a recent Private Eye, referring to the current crisis as going from Dad's Army's 'Keep calm!' to 'We're doomed!' :)

    Good to see how Moo and our American shipmates, or Huia and The Kiwis have gone through storm or quake situations before. We can always learn a thing or two in terms of being prepared. Good to read from you.
  • la vie en rougela vie en rouge Circus Host, 8th Day Host
    We are now on semi lockdown with everything closed except food shops and pharmacies. It's very surreal.

    The municipal elections are still on. When I went to vote this morning the polling station was busy but not excessively so. I am going to go back later and help with the count. Gloves and masks will be provided. AFAICT they were only asking younger people to volunteer - they don't want any older people doing it.

    I'm going to the office one last time tomorrow because I've realised my home computer is missing a file I need to connect to the server from outside. I'm going to get the IT to install it and then work from home for the foreseeable future.
  • DormouseDormouse Shipmate
    I'm hoping to be able to teach from home, but it does rather depend on students wanting lessons. Otherwise I wait to see what the French government will offer to help auto entrepreneurs. There are assurances for employees pay to be guaranteed, but I've not seen anything about us one person businesses...
  • CathscatsCathscats Shipmate
    @la vie en rouge I wish you joy working g from home if Captain Pyjamas is present! Been there, done that....
  • CameronCameron Shipmate
    I would like to confess to stockpiling...

    Besides the normal weekly shop, I now have in the house:
    - 1kg of various forms of chocolate / chocolate covered things (should I get more?)
    - Several forms of cake
    - Three tubs of ice cream
    - Four times as much cheese as I would normally consume in a week
    - Multiple packets of Percy Pigs
    - An extra bag of oats (this is Scotland, after all)

    Did I miss anything essential?


  • WHISKY?
  • CameronCameron Shipmate
    Alas I am teetotal - I have plenty of tea though :smile:
  • la vie en rougela vie en rouge Circus Host, 8th Day Host
    edited March 15
    @Dormouse The President mentioned "les indépendants" in his speech the other night. I think something's going to be announced in due course.

    I agree working from home with a toddler around the place is going to be quite unproductive but TBH I don't think there's really going to be anything to do. Usually about 60% of my job is organising travel and nobody's going anywhere.
  • A French lady was in our congo this morning, along with her (Kenyan) husband (who is studying at a local Uni), and their 5-year old son.

    Their home in France is near Beauvais, so not too far away from Our Place (almost the next county!), but their church, and little R's school, are closed, so J and R are happily staying with Papa in Angleterre...

    They've been to Our Place before, when in the parish, so we hope they'll be able to continue worshipping with us whilst we're still up-and-running.
  • Congregation numbers down this morning, but nothing cancelled - so far.
    Apparently there are hand sanitiser stations at front and side entrance - but I didn't notice them!
    Washing is more effective, anyway, or would be if the hot taps were connected!
  • Bishops FingerBishops Finger Shipmate
    edited March 15
    We have no running water in the church, but the hall (which is joined to the church, and has recently-refurbished WCs) was available for use, with the connecting doors left open to avoid anyone having to touch them.

    The collection basket was NOT passed round, but peeps were asked to pop their £££ into it before service - a reversion to our previous practice.
  • Wesley JWesley J Shipmate
    Pre-pay. I like it! :)
  • Bishops FingerBishops Finger Shipmate
    edited March 15
    It works OK if peeps get to church on time, as the basket is on a table in the middle of the church.

    Otherwise, the latecomers (about a third of the total attendance, some Sundays!) have to chuck their money in during the offertory hymn, with much to-ing and fro-ing.

    All most unseemly - maybe we'd do better to put the basket on the book table near the entrance, if this malarkey goes on.

    As a general observation, the mood at Mass was fairly upbeat. People are a bit fed-up with the whole virus thingy, but seemed cheerful, willing to co-operate, and to do things a bit differently.
  • Wesley JWesley J Shipmate
    Ok, I think we may have the same semi-lockdown that LVER and Dormouse have, over here as well, somewhat east of them. I guess I may have enough food, and will get any meds that need stocking up very soon too. I am so not looking forward to this! :(

    I'm happy to hear about BF's unfazed churchgoers - long may they continue!

    <votive>

  • SarasaSarasa Shipmate
    Cameron wrote: »
    I would like to confess to stockpiling...

    Besides the normal weekly shop, I now have in the house:
    - 1kg of various forms of chocolate / chocolate covered things (should I get more?)
    - Several forms of cake
    - Three tubs of ice cream
    - Four times as much cheese as I would normally consume in a week
    - Multiple packets of Percy Pigs
    - An extra bag of oats (this is Scotland, after all)

    Did I miss anything essential?


    I've stocked up on olives, but could probably do with more, and red wine, which I guess wouldn't be of interest to you @Cameron. I also made sure I've lots of herb teas. If I really couldn't go anywhere and the milk had run out at least I'd have something different to drink.
  • CameronCameron Shipmate
    Oh yes I agree @Sarasa - herbal teas are nice to have in.

    My local healthfood store stocks a good range and I am currently enjoying green roibos & manuka honey variety. I also like the ‘Pukka’ range of teas, mostly for their hopeful names like “feel new” and “love tea”!
  • My Anglican diocese has suspended all services until further notice. This morning I watched Mattins from the Cathedral on a FB feed. The cast was the Bishop, a reader, the choir, director, and camera person. The Bishop gave a very good, relevant homily.

    I haven't stocked up. It never occurred to me. I had to go to my local supermarket yesterday and was appalled - and bemused - by what had been plundered. Peanut butter, but not jams or jellies (!?). Chicken, but not pork so much. Frozen foods still very well stocked with good things. (If I were hoarding, that would be a prime category.) Green vegetables and potatoes well stocked (but definitely climbing in price), but not eddoes(!?). All paper product, pastas, rice, beans (dry and tinned) are gone. Teas and coffees are running short. Very strange.
  • If the end of the world is nigh, why is everyone stocking up?
  • Toilet paper, and peanut butter, may not be available in Heaven...

    ...or The Other Place.
  • Our regular fortnightly shopping trip is due on Tuesday, just hoping that we are still allowed out and about by then, and that the shelves are not empty.
    As I have been too lazy to go into the garage and fetch in the surplus I acquired pre-B**x*t I do have a stock of store-cupboard items. Its mostly fresh veg, fruit & dairy I need, and some frozen veg in case we can't get out when the next shopping trip is due.

    Thanks to Cameron for the reminder - chocolate now added to the shopping list.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    ... Green vegetables and potatoes well stocked (but definitely climbing in price), but not eddoes(!?) ...
    What's an eddoe?

    My sister and niece were supposed to be going to Tallinn for a long weekend on Friday, but Estonia has just closed its borders to foreign travellers. I think my sister's almost relieved that the decision to go or not has been taken out of her hands: she'd really rather not have to be around a load of strangers.

    She's also a schoolteacher, and would be quite happy if the Government were to close the schools.
  • Penny SPenny S Shipmate
    Peanut butter is protein, jams etc are not.
  • Eddoes:
    https://itzcaribbean.com/food/caribbean-food-glossary/eddoes/

    Funny-looking little chaps, though I say it as shouldn't. You cook/use them like potatoes.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Thanks, BF - they look like a cross between a coconut and a hedgehog! :smiley:
  • Wesley JWesley J Shipmate
    This reminds me: I need to get some jars of the peanut butter I sometimes have. But better don't buy too many: to my shame, I must admit I've just found some chocolate spread, comparable to Nutella, and nicer, and that was long forgotten. It used to taste better....! I really should venture onto the Decluttering thread and learn!

    A kindly shop assistant I talked to on Saturday morning agreed that she didn't know either what people were going to do with all the extraordinary amounts of food they were buying. She thought that much may end up on the compost heap or in the bin. :(
  • Autenrieth RoadAutenrieth Road Shipmate
    edited March 16
    Well, I'm home with five bags of groceries for my 14-day self-quarantine. I spent the past week in a town next door to a city with a large coronavirus cluster. I did my shopping in that town, and then drove it home with me. The grocery store there looked completely normal except for no hand-sanitizer at all.

    My stock-up items of choice are bottled iced coffee drinks, and canned spaghetti and meatballs. I also bought some beans, onions, and carrots. I hate cooking but I'm going to try to force myself to make soup.
  • Tried to book an online delivery for a fortnight's time, when my next shopping trip will be due - Sainsbury's has a three week booking availability, and every slot is taken.
    No doubt every day from now on will see the next bookable day's slots all taken within minutes of it being available.
    I wonder what time they add the next day?
  • kingsfoldkingsfold Shipmate
    Toilet paper, and peanut butter, may not be available in Heaven...

    ...or The Other Place.

    For as we know, The Other Place is damnation without relief
  • MooMoo Kerygmania Host
    Volunteers at my church will buy and deliver groceries to any parishioner who requests them.
  • We had our asbestos garage roof replaced two weeks ago. We moved the freezer in the garage into the house while the work was ongoing, and when we moved it back into the garage it no longer worked. It was a wedding present in 1989, and it had served us well.

    We went to replace it this weekend and lo! People have been panic buying freezers! There were none to be had. We have got one on order, which should arrive in April. If we had realised there would be a problem, we could have gone shopping last Thurs, and got one.
  • I have found a bottle of hand sanitiser in an old handbag, 3/4 full. No idea how old it is, but not less than two years, and possibly years older. Does the stuff go "off" ? There's no use-by date but that might indicate that it pre-dates use-by dates.
  • la vie en rougela vie en rouge Circus Host, 8th Day Host
    edited March 16
    Everyone's expecting full lock down to start tonight here. I am mostly dreading trying to keep a two year-old cooped up in the house. He's going to get, ahem, fractious. We're not stockpiling because we don't have the space, and buying food is so going to be the only reason you'll be allowed outside.
  • BoogieBoogie Shipmate
    I’m at the airport gate. My son gave me a mask. There’s a woman coughing uncontrollably, so I’m wearing it.

    😷😷
  • Meanwhile, in Aberdeen, last night's sell-out Lewis Capaldi concert went ahead, with a near-capacity crowd of 11,000.....
  • AnselminaAnselmina Shipmate
    Unintentional hilarity at communion service yesterday morning. We have a wee bottle of hand-sanitizer on the credence table to do the necessary for myself and my assistant. All the ablutioning takes place during the Offertory hymn.

    But because this bottle is so small (cannot find any others!!), I found it super hard to squeeze it enough to get the stuff out. My assistant totally misunderstood how the bottle operated, and began pressing on the lid, so I'm saying 'No, that's not the way it works. Squeeze the bottle.' And I shake it to try to get some liquid close to the top. Having failed to communicate to my assistant how this tiny bottle of handgel works, I have another go at squeezing it myself and a huge glob flies through the air (probably about a month's worth of communion celebrations!); whereupon I lose it and just laughed, and the assistant laughs, and we end up with hands drenched in the wretched stuff rubbing away like demented guilt-stricken Pilates! And the place smells like a hospital in deep-clean mode.

    All this under the amused gaze of the choir singing 'I heard the voice of Jesus say...'

    Yer gotta larf!!
  • Peeps are panic buying freezers :confused: but what are they putting into them? AFAIK, loo rolls, soap, and tins of tomato SOUP don't go off...

    All of those commodities were missing from Tesco's this morning - no, I tell a lie - there were tins of Tomato SOUP with No Added Sugar in profusion. One of the shop ladies told me that this was because the stuff tastes absolutely awful.

    Re Ye Auncient and Venerable Hand-Sanitiz'r of possibly ye 18thC, it may not have gone off, but I suspect it might be very weary!

    IANAC - I Am Not A Chemist...
  • DormouseDormouse Shipmate
    Both Mr FD and I were sent home. He can work from home & will get paid. I'm hoping my students will agree to phone/skype lessons, in which case I'll get paid. We have enough supplies to keep us going, but I'm assuming food shops will still stay open.
    My mum's neighbour in the UK discovered no supermarket was accepting new customers for online orders &delivery - except Waitrose! Mum's getting quite excited about what she's going to order!!
  • Anselmina wrote: »
    Unintentional hilarity at communion service yesterday morning. We have a wee bottle of hand-sanitizer on the credence table to do the necessary for myself and my assistant. All the ablutioning takes place during the Offertory hymn.

    But because this bottle is so small (cannot find any others!!), I found it super hard to squeeze it enough to get the stuff out. My assistant totally misunderstood how the bottle operated, and began pressing on the lid, so I'm saying 'No, that's not the way it works. Squeeze the bottle.' And I shake it to try to get some liquid close to the top. Having failed to communicate to my assistant how this tiny bottle of handgel works, I have another go at squeezing it myself and a huge glob flies through the air (probably about a month's worth of communion celebrations!); whereupon I lose it and just laughed, and the assistant laughs, and we end up with hands drenched in the wretched stuff rubbing away like demented guilt-stricken Pilates! And the place smells like a hospital in deep-clean mode.

    All this under the amused gaze of the choir singing 'I heard the voice of Jesus say...'

    Yer gotta larf!!

    Not sure that Jesus ever said 'Yer gotta larf...', but he might have done...

    Ahem.

    I was book-monitor yesterday at Mass, and we have just such a teeny-weeny bottle of The Holy Hand-Gel on the book table. Sure enough, it's quite hard to squeeze a little bit out, but we managed it OK. It's going to have to last us quite a while, I fear.

    As was said of Tomato Sauce:

    You curse, and swear, and shake the bottle.
    First none'll come, and then a lot'll.


  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    ... a teeny-weeny bottle of The Holy Hand-Gel ....
    Am I the only one who wanted to read that as holy hand-grenade (of Antioch)? :mrgreen:
  • No loo roll here, in inner-city co-op. Me and the till lady ended up in an unforseen parody of the 'four Yorkshiremen' as we discussed free things we had used to clean our arses back in the day. It was quite surreal :smile:

    (hums, 'pick up a leaf and wipe your underneath, in an English country gaaaarrden.')
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