Secular Christmas Music
For stuff that isn't choirs or carols.
I'm a fan of Sabaton's Christmas Truce*. I also like Jethro Tull's Christmas Song, loosely based on Once in Royal.
I've got an Open Mike in December so I'm working on acoustic versions of Tull's Ring out Solstice Bells and Slade's Merry Christmas Everybody - I will not attempt to replicate Noddy Holder's scream of "It's Christmas" because only he can do that. I'm sceptical about being able to do a reasonable acoustic version of the Sabaton but might explore the possibility.
What are other folks' likings in this area? You can confess to Mariah Carey if you need to. No-one will judge you.
*Please find it on the streaming platform of your choice and try to get it to Christmas No. 1 where it so ought to be.
I'm a fan of Sabaton's Christmas Truce*. I also like Jethro Tull's Christmas Song, loosely based on Once in Royal.
I've got an Open Mike in December so I'm working on acoustic versions of Tull's Ring out Solstice Bells and Slade's Merry Christmas Everybody - I will not attempt to replicate Noddy Holder's scream of "It's Christmas" because only he can do that. I'm sceptical about being able to do a reasonable acoustic version of the Sabaton but might explore the possibility.
What are other folks' likings in this area? You can confess to Mariah Carey if you need to. No-one will judge you.
*Please find it on the streaming platform of your choice and try to get it to Christmas No. 1 where it so ought to be.
Comments
Other than that? Eartha Kitt singing Santa Baby.
The nat king Cole festive album for all the right ones (inheriting the lp from my Grandma (no reindeer incidents) would be one)
Stop the Cavalry was one of the first singles I ever bought.
I'll think about this more.
You are not alone!
Mariah herself even releases a Halloween horror themed “It’s Time!” video every year to announce that as of November 1, she has been thawed from her icy prison to torment retail workers who will hear nothing else for two months.
Slade obviously. I also like Wizzard’s effort. Tull has been mentioned.
Greg Lake has hands down the best Christmas song (and video).
Then all of Shakin’ Stevens, Jona Lewis, Elton John, Paul Macartney.
John and Yoko’s effort was dross.
The nearest to ‘modern classic’ British Christmas songs are the Darkness and (genuinely) Elton John and Ed Sheeran from the COVID Christmas of 2020.
Nomination for should-be-a-classic-but-isn’t:
Barclay James Harvest - The Ballad of Denshaw Mill - beautiful, sad World War One Christmas myth from Saddleworth Moor. It’s on YouTube
Do they know it's Christmas? (sorry about that; I was given the 12-inch single as a Christmas present from my brother when it was released in 1984). Now they're marking 40 years, and I'm feeling old.
They said there'd be snow at Christmas
Stop the Cavalry
Mull of Kintyre (again, sorry about that). I don't really know why I like it, because in most other circumstances I don't like bagpipes.
I don't like:
Most American ones, especially anything by Bing Crosby. This is partly due to having spent one pre-Christmas season working in a shopping centre in Canada and being subjected to the most awful load of tosh for periods of seven hours at a time.
Even the blessed 'Fairytale of New York' becomes overplayed eventually, though I performed it with a colleague at a work Christmas do to great acclaim. We held up a picture of a packet of meatballs and a donkey instead of singing the more controversial lyrics!
My personal listening has to include
Maddy Prior & The Carnival Band - Carols and Capers (they manage the folky trick of singing about Jesus, cows, boar's heads and beer with equal joy and fervour).
The King's Singers - A Little Christmas Music (we once staged a dance to 'Patapan and Farandole' from this album which was so joyful, I'd love to do it again if we had the right people).
A Christmas Survival Guide - this is a musical revue with a cynical edge, performed by Broadway stars. Includes a less than family-friendly take on 'Sleigh Ride'.
A Broadway Christmas - lesser known songs such as 'Be A Santa' and 'The Christmas Child' from obscure shows.
I also enjoy a number of Big Band (Swing) versions of the Nutcracker. Here is Les Brown and His Band Of Renown's.
Here's The Brian Setzer Orchestra's.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=IJPc7esgvsA
Over the years the odd one or two have joined the canon, but really 1970-88 is the majority, and totally mainstream inescapable in shops and on the radio every year, even for today’s children. It’s an organic British new Christmas thing of the last 50 years. Much more likely to hear Slade or Wizzard than Bing Crosby in my experience. He’s inescapable too, but you’ll hear them or Greg Lake 5x for every once you hear him
God be praised.
Oh, turns out that Christmas Truce on solo acoustic doesn’t really work too well.
https://youtu.be/yfY4b1NszpY?si=j9FSjUyLqSKdbAO7
I have a love-hate relationship with it. On the plus side, it sounds great (partly due to pinching a wonderful tune from Prokofiev).
On the minus side, the lyrics basically equate to 'Santa isn't real so therefore neither is God, if you're naive enough to still believe then good for you but life sucks, enjoy!'
The last line, "The Christmas we get we deserve" particularly gets on my nerves. Most people deserve a far better Christmas than they actually get.
If I want a downbeat Christmas song, I usually stick with 'Fairytale of New York' which I think pulls off that mixture of misery and hopefulness much more successfully.
Or even Del Amitri's 'Nothing Ever Happens' for some seasonal doom and gloom.
https://youtu.be/TxbIU0X-lCI?si=tTdIj0vSBCfdPFw9
Interestingly, U2 covered it and changed a couple of critical words.
https://talku2.com/behind-song-believe-father-christmas/#:~:text=For Sinfeld, the song was,we get, we deserve.”
We’re going to see her in Abergavenny in December - sadly, it’s their farewell tour 😥 but she must be over 70 so travelling long distances can’t be so much fun.
We also like to use the version of Rudolph with audience responses (I think it's been used in The Simpsons but we learned it in Walt Disney World). Basically there are things for the audience to shout back after each line. Very silly indeed!
https://youtu.be/E8OPuwa783g?si=6gLYewVZ_VaeG0jo
He was perhaps best known as the sweary Father Jack in 'Father Ted' but this is a very different character by the name of Gobnait O'Lunacy.
And it must be time soon for 'Santa's a Scotsman'.
https://youtu.be/vkpOfHW75ck?si=iVVUajoA-VC_xdSm
Here is poor Mary. Heavily pregnant, she has been bumped about on a donkey all the way from Nazareth to Bethlehem. Arriving at Bethlehem, she goes into labour. With nowhere to stay, they finally find refuge in a stable. She gives birth, all on her own (can’t imagine Joseph would be much help!)
So she gets herself cleaned up, gets the baby cleaned up, feeds him (presumably) and gets him off to sleep. Totally exhausted, she tries to rest herself. Then what happens?
A choir of angels start singing! The baby wakes up. Mary tries to be gracious, thanks them. Eventually they leave. Mary gets the baby back to sleep.
A bunch of shepherds arrive, claiming they have been told to come and look at the baby. Baby wakes up. Mary tries to be gracious, welcomes them, shows them the baby, they leave. Mary gets the baby back to sleep.
Then another bunch of complete strangers arrive, claiming they have followed a star a long way to see the baby. Baby wakes up. Mary tries to be gracious, welcomes them, shows them the baby, they leave. Mary gets the baby back to sleep.
And then … a snotty little kid arrives and starts BANGING A DRUM ….
I will stick with Cliff !!!
It does make me smile that in the US, the version of 'Saviour's Day' which Sheila Walsh released omitted the 'raise up your glasses and drink to the King' part. Obviously too decadent for them...
Time for an early outing for this old groaner !
Whatever else FoNY may be, a dirge it isn't.
Did the UK release include it, I hope?
Did you hear Dominick the Donkey at the Adventurers Club at WDW?
https://youtu.be/yeMTyWZY3gU?si=oVK8Brlb-DAXc1Sm
It's not just a dirge. It's a dirge mainly sung by a man who can't sing very well and who appears to be drunk.
Stop the Cavalry was never intended to be a Christmas song. It’s an anti war song that was originally released in the summer and got nowhere. Because it included the line about a soldier wanting to be home in time for Christmas, some record producer had the bright idea of adding some jolly sounding Christmas bells and re-released it in time for Christmas, so Hey Presto, Jona Lewie never had to work again
I also don't like most glitzy American Christmas music, but I will make exceptions for "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" and "I'll Be Home for Christmas" because they are fundamentally sad songs about wanting to be with the people you love at Christmas, when you can't always be. Both are associated with the Second World War (their most famous recordings having been in 1943) which gives the idea of separation from the ones you love even more weight. I love a bit of pathos in my Christmas music.
With the reference to war-related Christmas songs, does anyone know "Christmas in the Trenches"? Or is that just a Canadian thing?
Oh that’s true! Hmm. Depending on the year of course. Ah, Nov 28 that year… my goodness, the thought of it being unusual to do all the Christmas stuff in early December!