@A Feminine Force: speaking as a European woman who requires an Ironbust Special with extra scaffolding to feel even remotely comfortable, I suspect you're looking in the wrong shops. I buy my bras at Leia or Bravissimo (which always irritates me, it should be Bravissima. Unless they make bras for men. Which they don't). I don't know whether they have branches in Spain but if not there is probably a Spanish equivalent. Their bras are (a lot) more expensive than M&S but much more comfortable and have a wider selection of styles.
Actually Bravissimo DO make bras for men as some trans men wear sports bras before being able to get chest surgery, and Bravissimo actually has specific trans-friendly events in their stores.
All bras are for people with boobs, and sometimes those people are men.
Good for Bravissimo/a/x. And apologies for any offence caused to trans men.
Why I know this I do not know, but back in the days (before those tight hipster type trousers of the sixties?early seventies?) when men are being measured for the trousers of bespoke suits the tailor would ask "on which side the gentleman dresses"
Yes, I’ve heard of that euphemism, also - per QI - it’s extremely unusual to have perfectly symmetrical balls and it said most men dress to the left. I suppose it is easier to adjust bra straps asymmetrically. To accommodate our natural lack of symmetry..
Other random factoid I came across on a chef ing corner of the internet, is that male-bodied kitchen and wait staff all need to use a good deal of talc equivalent owing to the heat and humidity - apparently it’s a well known thing amongst old hands in the catering trade.
I loathe and despise my own asymmetry, which appears to have something to do with my spine or shoulders, and results in the neckline of any top pulling to one side and completely exposing bra strap and all, lo, unto the very point of the shoulder. Not sure how to fix this, if it's even possible.
I loathe and despise my own asymmetry, which appears to have something to do with my spine or shoulders, and results in the neckline of any top pulling to one side and completely exposing bra strap and all, lo, unto the very point of the shoulder. Not sure how to fix this, if it's even possible.
Why I know this I do not know, but back in the days (before those tight hipster type trousers of the sixties?early seventies?) when men are being measured for the trousers of bespoke suits the tailor would ask "on which side the gentleman dresses"
Never an issue with most underkecks which hold it all together in front of and above the crotch.
Can't abide boxers or any other grundies that don't do this. Sitting down in those things means a DC10 Dex roll to avoid taking 1d6 crushing damage.
As for the scrunched forward position of the “all together,” we were told during fertility treatment research that those kinds of underwear tended to raise the temp in the testes too high, requiring a switch for some people to the kind that lets everything dangle in the wind.
As for the scrunched forward position of the “all together,” we were told during fertility treatment research that those kinds of underwear tended to raise the temp in the testes too high, requiring a switch for some people to the kind that lets everything dangle in the wind.
PS to above - they have plenty of women's equipment of the kind being discussed in this thread, and hardly any of it looks as if it came out of the Baldwin Locomotive Works (quoting father in law anent his mother).
@Lamb Chopped lingerie tape might work. It's a sort of double sided sticky tape that you attach to the garment on one side and your skin on the other. I've never tried it so I don't know how comfortable it is, but apparently the sort of people who walk down red carpets swear by the stuff.
As for the scrunched forward position of the “all together,” we were told during fertility treatment research that those kinds of underwear tended to raise the temp in the testes too high, requiring a switch for some people to the kind that lets everything dangle in the wind.
Wasn't 'Dangle in the Wind' a big hit in the 1960s?
And as a Scottish gentleman once somewhat remarked ambiguously, 'There's nothing worn under the kilt'.
@Lamb Chopped lingerie tape might work. It's a sort of double sided sticky tape that you attach to the garment on one side and your skin on the other. I've never tried it so I don't know how comfortable it is, but apparently the sort of people who walk down red carpets swear by the stuff.
William Theiss, the costume designer on the original Star Trek series, was well known for pushing the boundaries of female costuming just as far as the network would allow. The poor woman in the pink vaguely Greek dress in Who Mourns For Adonais?, for instance, had the drape down the back secured to her shoulder with surgical glue!
@Lamb Chopped lingerie tape might work. It's a sort of double sided sticky tape that you attach to the garment on one side and your skin on the other. I've never tried it so I don't know how comfortable it is, but apparently the sort of people who walk down red carpets swear by the stuff.
Unfortunately, I’m allergic.
You’ve probably thought of this; but would you be able to wear something with an asymmetric neckline - in such a way that the result looks even ?
I understood there were shops where women could get measured for bras. It used to be the case in M&S which is where my beloved gets hers.
Incidentally both our local branches have the women's changing rooms next to the lingerie, so that male partners who need to lurk nearby to give their opinions about what their wives are trying on find themselves stranded among knickers and bras while women are shopping for them. I am of a generation that finds this awkward. Similarly if I am shopping for underpants for myself I find the presence of women there off putting.
@Lamb Chopped lingerie tape might work. It's a sort of double sided sticky tape that you attach to the garment on one side and your skin on the other. I've never tried it so I don't know how comfortable it is, but apparently the sort of people who walk down red carpets swear by the stuff.
Unfortunately, I’m allergic.
You’ve probably thought of this; but would you be able to wear something with an asymmetric neckline - in such a way that the result looks even ?
I don’t think I’ve ever seen a top with an asymmetrical neckline. I’ll have to search and see.
Lots of people here have spoken about the difficulty of fastening bras at the back. Am I really the only one who fastens it at the front for ease, then swivels it around so the hooks are at the back, before 'leaning forward' into the cups and finally slipping straps over the shoulders? I've never used any other method?!
Lots of people here have spoken about the difficulty of fastening bras at the back. Am I really the only one who fastens it at the front for ease, then swivels it around so the hooks are at the back, before 'leaning forward' into the cups and finally slipping straps over the shoulders? I've never used any other method?!
I do this if reaching around backwards is too difficult (so, usually, if one of the metal loop things has come off and I can no longer get the right hooks into the right loops without looking). But it's uncomfortable having to swivel/slide the whole bra around my chest once it's fastened--I hate the binding feeling, even though it's only for a second. So I avoid it if I can.
I used to be a fasten-in-the-back person but in the last few years I've had occasional bouts of sore shoulders, and now, even when my shoulders aren't hurting, I have gone over to the swivelling side.
I've always been a swiveller, tbh nothing else is feasible. Which is not to say I don't hate it when you're just out of the shower and damp and sticky.
No surprises there; realised long ago that the redesigning of bras ( apart from half cup underwired numbers for 34b and under) is low on just about everyone’s list…
This lot are my go-to. I find the Anita range particularly comfortable - and like @Boogie comfort is all. I don't know what others consider expensive, but I think £50-60 not unreasonable for something I will get several years wear from.
I've ordered one in hope and anticipation.
It's a lovely blue, so np worries about straps showing. 🙂
Things is wires shape, but they don't support - I think a lot of folk wearing them put up with the discomfort because they think they would support better.
Ultimately they just stab you in the chest, trash your washing machine and disappear.
I refuse to wear underwire bras, gave them up ages ago. The women's mags and style pages always say if they're uncomfortable it's because you've got the wrong size or fit, but after trying various sizes and brands I decided I just didn't want a piece of metal shaping a soft part of my body. And frankly the whole "gives you a better shape" thing we get from style writers and bra marketers pisses me off. People's shapes are fine the way they are. If folks want a particular shape, fine, but don't tell us all we have to look a certain way.
I like to think this will all be invaluable to budding authors wanting to write authentically about members of another sex.
Men will never know the pleasure of discarding a bra mid evening. Unclipping, pulling it down one sleeve, then the other and casting it away. Sheer bliss!
My wife used to perform that trick while driving. It always amazed me that she could do it!
I have always been a swiveller, too, as my mama taught me.
Speaking of mama, for decades she wore Busy Lady bras from Sears. When they were discontinued, mama never liked any of the bras she tried to replace them.
Things is wires shape, but they don't support - I think a lot of folk wearing them put up with the discomfort because they think they would support better.
Ultimately they just stab you in the chest, trash your washing machine and disappear.
Also the annoying little plastic "boning" in the sides of some bras, which does nothing but was always a sensory problem for me. Wires were less of a problem (wrt comfort) than those, but they always lost their shape so quickly or even snapped while I was wearing a bra.
It is true that wires don't really support, though - most support comes from the band.
Was a swiveller until I started going regularly to the gym and eventually got fed up with the struggle to swivel a tight bra when damp. Now can do it up at the back by feel with relative ease but also taught myself to put on tight over the head bras as well. NO, I will not do underwire or any such thing, it always felt to me like a mode of torture not to be endured and my brief trials of the have only confirmed this. I am a Doreen fan but must admit that so far trying out the M&S Crop Top does seem to be comfortable. It is tighter that I was expecting to get on but once on comfortable despite the thinness of the material.
Other random factoid I came across on a chef ing corner of the internet, is that male-bodied kitchen and wait staff all need to use a good deal of talc equivalent owing to the heat and humidity - apparently it’s a well known thing amongst old hands in the catering trade.
Fairly common in some sports too, heat humidity and chafing.
Now we've arrived in Blighty, shopping for underpinnings is on my list. Good undies are available in France, but at a much higher price for the same quality. I shall be patronising Marks and Spencer.
I'm booking a trip to Bravissimo in the next week or so (probably dragging along the bloke and forcing him to sit amongst the lingerie, looking at his feet, for an hour like last time) as I am getting increasingly frustrated with bra hunting. My size is what my partner describes as "magnificent" - slightly more flattering than the M&S saleswoman who accidentally uttered "Good grief, they're immense!" before realising that was every so slightly unprofessional and apologising profusely!
What frustrates me is the number of online bra companies who say "We design especially for the bigger boobed bodies" - if that's the case, why do they stop at size 38 H or J? and in some cases, stop at 36 D !!!! I do like the Big Bloomers' pull-on bras but even those are just a little too small and can.. not to put too fine a point on it.... let things escape from time to time! I can't stand wired - whatever torturer invented those things? I just hope Bravissimo live up to previous standards as far as their unwired bras go, but last time I visited they seemed only to do very plain unwired large bras - why can't big be pretty too?
M&S bras don’t seem to fit me. Last time I tried to replace my bras I tried on about a dozen there (no wires, don’t like them) and left in frustration without buying anything. On an impulse I tried one bra on in Next and it was a perfect fit, so I hastily ordered four online in case they were discontinued!
Sloggi also work for me.
I think M&S still use the incorrect and outdated method of adding however many inches to your measurements - this results in a band size too large and cup sizes too small. In reality your back size IS your band size (obviously rounded up or down as needed) and the difference between your bust and back measurements gives your cup size, that's why sister sizes are a thing. I can't recommend the reddit subreddit of A Bra That Fits well enough - lots of info on measuring yourself accurately and about different brands etc.
@Smudgie have you tried SimplyBe? The big problem with Bravissimo (imo) is that their band sizes stop at 40 or so - yes, many women are given a band size that's too big but some of us do also have a bigger band size because we have bigger bodies as well as bigger boobs! SimplyBe also have quite a few front-fastening bras if that is helpful.
I was a swiveller when I wore bras with clasps, even though I'm hypermobile and can reach my back - I need to see what I'm doing, to make sure it's in the right clasp, and also to ensure it's all tucked properly. But now I wear bralettes and they have no clasps, nothing hard at all, just fabric, and I put it over my head.
Also - men being embarrassed amongst the lingerie (and apparently even the men's underwear section if women are there) is so silly to me. If you're waiting read a book or something, but otherwise surely plenty of men are buying lingerie for their partner? Likewise women buying underwear for their partners (or indeed sons) seems very normal and I don't understand why it would be embarrassing to witness. Everybody needs underwear, it's just part of clothing like socks or sweaters.
I asked my wife if it wouldn't be easier just to sling the bra from a hook on a door or something and just spin herself around. She gave me a look and told me to check it out with those people on the Ship.
Comments
Good for Bravissimo/a/x. And apologies for any offence caused to trans men.
Why I know this I do not know, but back in the days (before those tight hipster type trousers of the sixties?early seventies?) when men are being measured for the trousers of bespoke suits the tailor would ask "on which side the gentleman dresses"
Other random factoid I came across on a chef ing corner of the internet, is that male-bodied kitchen and wait staff all need to use a good deal of talc equivalent owing to the heat and humidity - apparently it’s a well known thing amongst old hands in the catering trade.
Spray mount might work.
Never an issue with most underkecks which hold it all together in front of and above the crotch.
Can't abide boxers or any other grundies that don't do this. Sitting down in those things means a DC10 Dex roll to avoid taking 1d6 crushing damage.
As for the scrunched forward position of the “all together,” we were told during fertility treatment research that those kinds of underwear tended to raise the temp in the testes too high, requiring a switch for some people to the kind that lets everything dangle in the wind.
A friend who was recovering from prostate cancer treatment was enthusiastic about Ballroom jeans: https://www.duluthtrading.com/men/collections/ballroom-jeans/
Fortunately mine worked fine regardless.
And as a Scottish gentleman once somewhat remarked ambiguously, 'There's nothing worn under the kilt'.
Unfortunately, I’m allergic.
You’ve probably thought of this; but would you be able to wear something with an asymmetric neckline - in such a way that the result looks even ?
Incidentally both our local branches have the women's changing rooms next to the lingerie, so that male partners who need to lurk nearby to give their opinions about what their wives are trying on find themselves stranded among knickers and bras while women are shopping for them. I am of a generation that finds this awkward. Similarly if I am shopping for underpants for myself I find the presence of women there off putting.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen a top with an asymmetrical neckline. I’ll have to search and see.
I do this if reaching around backwards is too difficult (so, usually, if one of the metal loop things has come off and I can no longer get the right hooks into the right loops without looking). But it's uncomfortable having to swivel/slide the whole bra around my chest once it's fastened--I hate the binding feeling, even though it's only for a second. So I avoid it if I can.
I couldn't help but bw reminded of:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dick_Swiveller
I usually take mine off an hour or two before getting undressed for bed, so I unfasten it and remove it by pulling it through my sleeves.
I've ordered one in hope and anticipation.
It's a lovely blue, so np worries about straps showing. 🙂
Ultimately they just stab you in the chest, trash your washing machine and disappear.
My wife used to perform that trick while driving. It always amazed me that she could do it!
Speaking of mama, for decades she wore Busy Lady bras from Sears. When they were discontinued, mama never liked any of the bras she tried to replace them.
Also the annoying little plastic "boning" in the sides of some bras, which does nothing but was always a sensory problem for me. Wires were less of a problem (wrt comfort) than those, but they always lost their shape so quickly or even snapped while I was wearing a bra.
It is true that wires don't really support, though - most support comes from the band.
Fairly common in some sports too, heat humidity and chafing.
What frustrates me is the number of online bra companies who say "We design especially for the bigger boobed bodies" - if that's the case, why do they stop at size 38 H or J? and in some cases, stop at 36 D !!!! I do like the Big Bloomers' pull-on bras but even those are just a little too small and can.. not to put too fine a point on it.... let things escape from time to time! I can't stand wired - whatever torturer invented those things? I just hope Bravissimo live up to previous standards as far as their unwired bras go, but last time I visited they seemed only to do very plain unwired large bras - why can't big be pretty too?
Sloggi also work for me.
@Smudgie have you tried SimplyBe? The big problem with Bravissimo (imo) is that their band sizes stop at 40 or so - yes, many women are given a band size that's too big but some of us do also have a bigger band size because we have bigger bodies as well as bigger boobs! SimplyBe also have quite a few front-fastening bras if that is helpful.