Who are the fashion police?

Who are you to tell me at my age I should not wear Jeans, sparking clothes,
pins, flower prints, and colored eyeliner? You claim it will make me look old. Hells Bells ( old saying) I am 86 I am old and will wear what I please. Are you same people who are also telling me that the color of my walls in the house that I painted just three years ago are now outdated and I need to re-paint? So you are saying not only do I look old but my house looks old as well? Mind your own business.
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Comments

  • Now I want to hear about these people. (munches on potato chips)
  • Half the fun of dressing “ unsuitably” is revving up the fashion police.

    Almost as fun as stirring up the church police ( your knees/midriff/ armpits/ whatever are showing)

    Just enjoy it.
  • Even better, tell ‘ em to stuff off
  • I constrain my policing to American football games on TV. It's the only way I can share them with my husband. I can give you the highlights on all the best and worst uniforms. Miami has always had my favorite colors. Penn States' look like they are on loan from the middle school team.
  • Who are you to tell me at my age I should not wear Jeans, sparking clothes,
    pins, flower prints, and colored eyeliner? You claim it will make me look old. Hells Bells ( old saying) I am 86 I am old and will wear what I please. Are you same people who are also telling me that the color of my walls in the house that I painted just three years ago are now outdated and I need to re-paint? So you are saying not only do I look old but my house looks old as well? Mind your own business.
    Who are you to tell me at my age I should not wear Jeans, sparking clothes,
    pins, flower prints, and colored eyeliner? You claim it will make me look old. Hells Bells ( old saying) I am 86 I am old and will wear what I please. Are you same people who are also telling me that the color of my walls in the house that I painted just three years ago are now outdated and I need to re-paint? So you are saying not only do I look old but my house looks old as well? Mind your own business.

    Go ahead, wear that bikini, if you like.
  • Just as an aside, later in her life, Mom told me how much Dad told her what she could wear or not wear. She chaffed at his expectations.

    I know I don't dare tell my wife what she can or cannot wear. That would be grounds for divorce--and the kids would support her.
  • la vie en rougela vie en rouge Purgatory Host, Circus Host
    I thought the whole point of being old was that you were allowed not to give a damn?
  • ArielAriel Shipmate
    edited November 2023
    2023 BC, Crete: hoop earrings are great. The bigger the better. The queen has enormous hoop earrings. Wish we were as posh and fashionable and could afford that.

    2023 AD, Britain: hoop earrings are awful and tacky. The smaller the better. Don't be seen dead wearing them. Actually, get something else instead.

    * * *

    No idea who decides these things, or who chooses "Colour of the Year" (magenta, since you ask) but have what you like. I have absolutely no intention of fading into beige clothing and getting a shapeless perm with blue rinse because I'm older. I've also been told by more than one person that the Anais Anais perfume is a young person's perfume, but there's no label on it saying so or proscription on my buying it, and on the occasions when I wear it I do so to evoke the memories of those younger days.

    And whoever chose grey, teal and mustard yellow as the predominant colours for the past few years needs to be taken out and had a stern word with.
  • When I am old I shall wear Purple ....

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8cACbzanitg

    Enjoy!
  • KarlLBKarlLB Shipmate
    edited November 2023
    Can someone answer the question in the OP and tell me who the fashion police are? Only I've not actually experienced being told what to wear, outside of work dress codes. Are there really people out there making it their business to tell other people what to wear? I mean there are articles in the press but I just ignore them.
  • @KarlLB - If you are a man above a certain age (as I am), no-one cares what you look like, for good or ill.

    The fashion police are a strongly gender and age biased cultural institution and women suffer from their opprobrium.
  • Cameron wrote: »
    @KarlLB - If you are a man above a certain age (as I am), no-one cares what you look like, for good or ill.

    The fashion police are a strongly gender and age biased cultural institution and women suffer from their opprobrium.

    I don't know if I'm above or below a certain age but I may indeed be being saved from this by my gender alone.

    But that leaves open the question of who they actually are and how they assert their malign influence.
  • ArielAriel Shipmate
    edited November 2023
    KarlLB wrote: »
    Can someone answer the question in the OP and tell me who the fashion police are? Only I've not actually experienced being told what to wear, outside of work dress codes. Are there really people out there making it their business to tell other people what to wear? I mean there are articles in the press but I just ignore them.

    Oh yes.

    "Seriously, are you wearing that to an interview? First impressions and all that. You won't get the job."
    "Not really suitable for the office."
    "We want our employees to look smart and professional."
    "No jeans or trainers please."
    "Black tie event."
    "Not at the wedding/funeral you don't. Save it for when you get home."
    "You can't go out like that."
    "You need a belt with that."
    "What shoes should I wear tonight?"
    "Yep, good, but pull it up/down a bit."
    "You can't go wrong with black."
    "What can I wear with ..."
    "I've got to have a hat for this. What sort of hat should I have?"
    "Mm, good, but you need a bit of jewellery with that."
    "Read this to find out how to avoid looking like mutton dressed as lamb..."

    ... etc.
  • DoublethinkDoublethink Admin, 8th Day Host
    Press, YouTube, social media, partners, parents, siblings, friends, colleagues, random people who comment with good (or not) intentions.

    “She’s no better than she ought to be”, “mutton dressed as lamb” “should you go with xxx now you’re a woman of a certain age” “oh you wear still wear x, I wouldn’t dare !” Etc etc etc ad nauseam.
  • BoogieBoogie Heaven Host
    My friends.

    When I’m hiding from the sun on the top of an open top bus (various cities) and wearing a sun hat and various scarves round my shoulders/arms. They refuse to sit next to me. 😂

    In normal times I use a sun umbrella, but that doesn’t on the top of a sightseeing bus.
  • KarlLB wrote: »
    Cameron wrote: »
    @KarlLB - If you are a man above a certain age (as I am), no-one cares what you look like, for good or ill.

    The fashion police are a strongly gender and age biased cultural institution and women suffer from their opprobrium.

    I don't know if I'm above or below a certain age but I may indeed be being saved from this by my gender alone.

    But that leaves open the question of who they actually are and how they assert their malign influence.

    They thrive on those who take notice of them; if no one does they wither and die

  • ArielAriel Shipmate
    Look, from the moment you're born as a girl your appearance and how you present yourself are major preoccupations to you and to those around you. Boys do not usually experience this to anything like the same degree. Leaving aside the rights and wrongs of this, it is a deeply ingrained part of the female mindset. This is also connected with avoiding trouble, censure, or unwanted male attention. It is extremely difficult to shake off.

    I've learnt that if I wear red I will get comments from men in the street. This happens almost every time. I now generally only wear my red jacket if I'm feeling particularly confident or if it's dark. My yellow jacket attracted attention from drunks one evening with a persistent "Hello darling, what's your name" until a passing policeman told them to stop. I didn't wear it for months after that in case they were still around and would recognize it.

    I've learnt that if I wear pink suddenly I am much more approachable and everybody is more friendly. Old ladies talk to me, checkout staff smile and wish me a good day.

    I've learnt to make myself look unattractive and unapproachable when out alone in the evenings. Equally, I was trained in how to make the best of what I have to make a good impression, particularly on dates.

    Men do not have to do this.

    I have had dates when I've dressed nicely, ensured hair and makeup were to their best advantage, turned up and found myself sitting opposite someone who'd made no effort at all. This is the way it goes.
  • I'm a geezer, but I find fashion fascinating, and read the fashion columns avidly. It is a bit ridulous that a journalist can make pronouncements about clothes, this year, you need such and such a garment. However, there is fun in it too, isn't there. (Always got togged up on dates).
  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    I get up in the morning and generally put on old clothes - or, as I think of them 'clothes'. I'm currently wearing stretch navy trousers from M&S Nondescript Range, a top from when hanky hems were In, and a hand knitted waistcoat. When I get dressed up, it's in even older clothes - since they're not worn much, they last longer. Twenty or thirty years in some cases.

    Whatever I'm wearing it's accessorised with an invisible T-shirt saying I Don't Give a Damn What You Think.
  • I grow old ... I grow old ...
    I shall wear the bottoms of my trousers rolled.

    Shall I part my hair behind? Do I dare to eat a peach?
    I shall wear white flannel trousers, and walk upon the beach.
    I have heard the mermaids singing, each to each.
  • :lol:

    I dress according to the code mostly adhered to by the older members of my Family, to wit, Scruffy (/baggy shirt/pullover/tracksuit bottoms).

    My niece says that the Family sometimes exerts itself to employ what she calls *Hobo Chic* - though I'm not quite certain what she means by that. In any case, she herself is usually well turned-out, and indeed (when *going out*) is best described as elegant...her kingfisher-blue dress is a beautiful item of attire, and suits her to a T.

    Oddly enough, I have an invisible T-shirt, like unto that mentioned by @Firenze. At my age, I really Do Not Give A Flying Wossname as to what anyone else thinks...
  • I guess that some people need to be told what to wear.
  • DoublethinkDoublethink Admin, 8th Day Host
    How would you tell ?
  • ArielAriel Shipmate
    Firenze wrote: »
    Whatever I'm wearing it's accessorised with an invisible T-shirt saying I Don't Give a Damn What You Think.

    This is the thing. Many of us don't "just get dressed", there's often some conscious element of complying with current standards, or thinking "stuff you". At home I wear whatever I please. I don't always go out in it though.

    Today I'm wearing a long turquoise summer beach skirt and a deep orange T-shirt. I love the colours and feel comfortable in them. But they aren't appropriate for the weather outside and even if it was I wouldn't wear them anyway because round here it would attract attention and comment. I rarely got comments when I lived in Oxford and I don't get comments in other cities, but outside of those, in smaller places, yes, I do. I love bright colours but I've learnt to conceal these round here.

    I will probably be going to the shops later and so I will change into something warmer, darker and more nondescript. I'm sick of the way blokes hang around on the streets in groups with cans of booze or cluster around benches with carrier bags of drink but that's the way it is.
  • Bishops FingerBishops Finger Shipmate
    edited November 2023
    Telford wrote: »
    I guess that some people need to be told what to wear.

    Why?

  • Telford wrote: »
    I guess that some people need to be told what to wear.

    Why?
    Because I am not sure I know why they need to be told what to wear.

  • Telford wrote: »
    Telford wrote: »
    I guess that some people need to be told what to wear.

    Why?
    Because I am not sure I know why they need to be told what to wear.

    I'm not sure what you're on about. Surely no-one needs to be told what to wear - would you agree with that?
  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    They seek him here, they seek him there
    His clothes are loud, but never square
    It will make or break him so he's got to buy the best
    'Cause he's a dedicated follower of fashion


    Ah, memories.

    I don't mind fashion as a spectator sport - I'm a follower of Tom and Lorenzo
  • I dress somewhat eccentrically and often in bright colours (currently wearing a red and mauve patterned maxi dress covered by a full length patchwork duster coat with Chinese fastenings) and am happy to walk the streets like this but Cambridge is a very liberal town to live in so nobody cares.
    But I am careful what I wear to see a doctor so that they don’t judge me as either manic or depressed and start showing an interest in my mental health.
  • Telford wrote: »
    Telford wrote: »
    I guess that some people need to be told what to wear.

    Why?
    Because I am not sure I know why they need to be told what to wear.

    I'm not sure what you're on about. Surely no-one needs to be told what to wear - would you agree with that?
    I wouldn't disagree with you but there's a saying/tradition in the Black Country that when a chap is going out in the winter, his wife tells him " Put your big coat on"

  • Telford wrote: »
    Telford wrote: »
    Telford wrote: »
    I guess that some people need to be told what to wear.

    Why?
    Because I am not sure I know why they need to be told what to wear.

    I'm not sure what you're on about. Surely no-one needs to be told what to wear - would you agree with that?
    I wouldn't disagree with you but there's a saying/tradition in the Black Country that when a chap is going out in the winter, his wife tells him " Put your big coat on"

    :lol:

    The sort of thing My Old Mum would say...even when it might have been considered that I was old enough to think of it myself...
  • LeafLeaf Shipmate
    Telford wrote: »
    Telford wrote: »
    I guess that some people need to be told what to wear.

    Why?
    Because I am not sure I know why they need to be told what to wear.

    Like a uniform? Isn't that being told what to wear?
  • GwaiGwai Epiphanies Host
    KarlLB wrote: »
    Can someone answer the question in the OP and tell me who the fashion police are? Only I've not actually experienced being told what to wear, outside of work dress codes. Are there really people out there making it their business to tell other people what to wear? I mean there are articles in the press but I just ignore them.

    One example was when I was a young professional I was told "aren't you cold with those bare shoulders? I'd be so cold wearing that!" I asked a couple people I trusted and all agreed that I was being told that my dress shirt was inappropriate because it did not cover my shoulders.

    At the time I stopped wearing that shirt, but now my personal response is: Gogol Bordello - Start Wearing Purple
  • RuthRuth Shipmate
    Ariel wrote: »
    I love bright colours but I've learnt to conceal these round here.

    I note when I travel to cities in the American northeast -- Boston, New York -- I stick out like a sore thumb in my brightly colored clothes. Here in southern California you can pretty much wear whatever you want on the street. I only get comments if I'm wearing my t-shirt that reads "DAY DRINKING AND NAPS" in big letters on the front.
  • ArielAriel Shipmate
    When /I first moved here I went out in a pretty orange floral skirt and white top and some young man actually ran across the street after me with "Madam? Madam?? Madam!! Are you all right? How are you?"

    Orange is not a sign of being visibly unwell 😬
  • LeafLeaf Shipmate
    I feel like it's a privilege not to have to care about fashion. It means that you are at a point in life - by age, retirement, social position - where you do not have to audition anymore. No one's judgment about your appearance matters if nothing is riding on that judgment.

    ISTM there's a kind of anxiety that can attach to still having to audition for jobs, relationships, social position. I remember feeling like I had to be aware of fashion and make choices accordingly. It is pure privilege that I no longer feel that way; I don't have to audition if I don't want to.

    So I'm just a shade uneasy about boasting about privilege, when I remember not having it. "I don't have to do x, like those other poor schmucks" is, I don't know, kind of not cool.
  • RuthRuth Shipmate
    I'd make a distinction between fashion and dress codes (both written and unwritten). Unless you work in certain fields, you don't have to care about fashion -- you can buy what the stores are selling, and you'll be fashionable enough. The dress codes that dictate what is and isn't acceptable at school, at work, on dates -- those are another thing altogether. Not having to care about dress codes is indeed a privilege.
  • I'm with Telford here, I often need to be told what to wear, or rather, what not to wear. And here I quote Mrs RR, "you can't possibly wear that to church and read the lesson!"

    I put on a more sober waistcoat.
  • RockyRoger wrote: »
    I'm with Telford here, I often need to be told what to wear, or rather, what not to wear. And here I quote Mrs RR, "you can't possibly wear that to church and read the lesson!"

    I put on a more sober waistcoat.

    You should have responded "why not?" to establish whether there's any actual substance to the objection.
  • KarlLB wrote: »
    RockyRoger wrote: »
    I'm with Telford here, I often need to be told what to wear, or rather, what not to wear. And here I quote Mrs RR, "you can't possibly wear that to church and read the lesson!"

    I put on a more sober waistcoat.

    You should have responded "why not?" to establish whether there's any actual substance to the objection.

    You haven't met Mrs RR have you? 'It's old and tatty' is the usual response'. And she's right.

    But all these exchanges are good natured and fun.....

    Sorry for the tangent .... I understand the pressure my daughters and now grandaughters face in the world to conform and try to be nothing but accepting.
  • MaryLouiseMaryLouise Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    An older woman friend of mine said that when she got fed up with people staring at her patterned tights and bold stripy overshirts, she grew a moustache and small goatee. After that she found people would give her a startled glance and hastily avert their eyes. Her husband didn't notice the facial hair.
  • Our younger daughter... Before she left for university it was worth my while to get up extra early and off to work before she saw me and could give me hell for the sartorial atrocity of the day. Thankfully, my Dear Wife had given that up years before, and a wordless blank gaze was sufficient.
  • My beloved husband wears whatever people give to him--and since people are ALWAYS giving him stuff, often from trips home to Vietnam, some of it is pretty startling in design and color. He's presently got a set of polo shirts where the color is x and the facings (the bit that shows when the shirt button is undone?--is some absolute horror of a mismatched tropical fruit color. Think aqua for the main shirt color and orange for the facings and trim of the shirt.
  • ArethosemyfeetArethosemyfeet Shipmate, Heaven Host
    My beloved husband wears whatever people give to him--and since people are ALWAYS giving him stuff, often from trips home to Vietnam, some of it is pretty startling in design and color. He's presently got a set of polo shirts where the color is x and the facings (the bit that shows when the shirt button is undone?--is some absolute horror of a mismatched tropical fruit color. Think aqua for the main shirt color and orange for the facings and trim of the shirt.

    Sounds fine to me but then I'm colour blind. :grimace:
  • My beloved husband wears whatever people give to him--and since people are ALWAYS giving him stuff, often from trips home to Vietnam, some of it is pretty startling in design and color. He's presently got a set of polo shirts where the color is x and the facings (the bit that shows when the shirt button is undone?--is some absolute horror of a mismatched tropical fruit color. Think aqua for the main shirt color and orange for the facings and trim of the shirt.

    Sounds fine to me but then I'm colour blind. :grimace:

    As am I. Therefore, I tend to where the same solids day in and day out. But I am getting tired of red--or is it crimson--could be coral, maybe maroon.
  • The louder the shirt, the more likely I am to wear it.
  • HugalHugal Shipmate
    Ok have a selection of loud shirts. I am currently wearing a nice autumn leaves shirt. I am of an age (56) where I am not too bothered about fashion. However, once a competitive ballroom dancer always a competitive ballroom dancer. I can glam up when required.
  • I'm quite enjoying the current flurry of activity on 'Christian' Twitter about how 'real men' dress - whoever knew that scarves were effeminate! (Makes a change from modest attire for women).
  • My beloved husband wears whatever people give to him
    My entire wardrobe was bought for me by my Dear Departed - before meeting him, I only ever wore shades of beige/brown or denim blue and grey and it became his mission to re-educate me! Over the years, I've discovered I actually like brighter colours... and since he passed have even adopted a lot of his even bolder outfits.

  • ArethosemyfeetArethosemyfeet Shipmate, Heaven Host
    I'm quite enjoying the current flurry of activity on 'Christian' Twitter about how 'real men' dress - whoever knew that scarves were effeminate! (Makes a change from modest attire for women).

    Wait until they find out about Joseph's dress!
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