Today I Consign To Hell -the All Saints version

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Comments

  • Piglet wrote: »
    That's all very well, BF, as long as he doesn't print the paper as well ... :mrgreen:

    Ah yes - I hadn't thought of that...
    :grimace:

    IJ

  • LydaLyda Shipmate
    I hope that the funeral family TheOrganist refers to above will suitably penalise that egregious printer by simply not paying...or, if it's too late for that, by alerting the local newspaper to the complete co*k-up.

    IJ

    Do you have small claims court? Or even better, court TV shows? I think that would be a fun Judge Judy episode. :naughty:
  • CaissaCaissa Shipmate
    TICTH the administrations response on the Styx transphobia thread.
  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    Vinyl gloves.

    1. The necessity for wearing them.
    2. The impossibility of getting the buggers on hot and sweaty hands.

    And while I’m here, my curse attend the humidity levels that make the feeblest attempt at housework (and none come feebler than mine) into a self-sauna.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Caissa wrote: »
    TICTH the administrations response on the Styx transphobia thread.

    Hostly oink
    @Caissa, I don't think this is the place to register your disagreement about a ruling from the Admins, so I'm referring it to them for their advice.
    Piglet, AS host
  • Alan Cresswell Alan Cresswell Admin, 8th Day Host
    Caissa wrote: »
    TICTH the administrations response on the Styx transphobia thread.
    TICTH people who are unable to comprehend simple ideas, such as "if you have a disagreement with how members of the Crew act, raise the question in the Styx".

    The rule that all questions about how the H&As run things is something else that can be asked in the Styx.

    Now, run along to the Styx if you really wish to pursue this. Or, shut up about it.

    Consider this a final warning.

    Alan
    Ship of Fools Admin
  • Bishops FingerBishops Finger Shipmate
    edited July 2018
    I think the Hot Weather must be getting to people....

    ...re vinyl gloves, yes, but...they came in very handy (sic) when I was an official NHS Ambulanceperson, though I admit they tended to induce Heat and Sweatiness.

    Better that, though, than some of the Stuff patients were carrying around with them...
    :grimace:

    IJ
  • Firenze wrote: »
    <snip> my curse attend the humidity levels that make the feeblest attempt at housework (and none come feebler than mine) into a self-sauna.

    What is this House Work you mention? Do you mean people actually clean their carpets before they crunch under-foot?

    Actually, if the heat and humidity really get to you, try doing what you can at night when it is cooler. And I can tell you that an extension lead makes ironing under a gazebo or pergola not only a possibility but a distinct improvement on doing the same in the house of a summer evening :grin:

  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    Ir Ning is a place in Tibet as far as I’m concerned.

    As for cleaning at night, it is only the sunlight (busie old fool, unruly sun) makes the need evident. In der Nacht sind alle Katzen schmuddelig*.

    *At nights all cats are grubby
  • My cleaner has just been and I agree about the sun shining into dusty corners. Main road and wind does not help either. However, all is now sparkly clean.
  • PriscillaPriscilla Shipmate
    TICTH drivers who park across dropped kerbs, people who stand and chat blocking dropped kerbs and people who leave their dustbins ON dropped kerbs.
    Can you see the link yet?
  • Lily PadLily Pad Shipmate
    Might I add on by saying how much it drives me crazy when the disabled parking places are far away from the dropped curbs (as we spell them here) and so there are cars legally parked and yet blocking access. And, while I am at it, who is it that decides where the push buttons go on the automatic doors? Some are on the left, some on the right, and some between the doors and they always seem to be where it is impossible to make a straight line into a building. Why, in this day and age, are all doors not automatic ones?
  • Bishops FingerBishops Finger Shipmate
    edited July 2018
    On much the same lines, TICTH my own Idiot Self for parking at a town-centre bus stop.

    The bus stop is right next to the door of the church which hosts our local Food Bank, and I was delivering a couple of bags of groceries collected at Our Place.

    The church's own restricted parking space was filled with cars and vans (they are having some repairs done to the church floor AIUI), so there was nowhere else where I could stop, and be out of the way of traffic, for the few minutes it would take to get the bags out of the car, and into the church. Moreover, no buses were in sight, and only two or three peeps actually waiting.

    Ha! Nemesis catcheth up quickly with him who parketh unlawfully.

    No sooner had I got out of the car than the Council Parking Enforcement Officer appeared (rather like the Demon King at a pantomime), to upbraid me for obstructing the bus stop, to take a photograph of my car, and to issue me there and then with a Parking Enforcement Notice, complete with £70 fine.

    Fortunately, I have a GSOH, so realised that the Game Was Up, and that I was Banged to Rights, Guv. The officer was very friendly and polite - not to say apologetic for having caught me red-handed - and expressed his thanks when I smilingly told him that I would pray for him...

    O, Doers Of Good Deeds - beware! Ensure you're not infringing local byelaws whilst doing those Good Deeds, or you may find yourselves out of pocket...
    :grimace:

    IJ
  • BF - no good deed goes unpunished...
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Poor BF - that verily doth suck great festering goose-balls.
  • KarlLBKarlLB Shipmate
    TICTH open-mouthed chewers, slurpers of drinks, scrapers of cutlery against teeth and noisy lickers of fingers. As every day.
  • And also they that scrape their chair across the café floor, rather than lifting it....
    :rage:

    IJ
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    TICTH Wee Bitey Things (again). Despite my taking an extra Vitamin B tablet and squirted myself liberally with bitey-thing-repellent, the little buggers got me at the party we were at the other night with two great lumps on one leg and another on a foot.
  • I've not heard of Vitamin B as being a guard against Wee Bitey Things - perhaps it doesn't work quite as well as one might hope?

    Not exactly Wee Bitey Things, but I noticed some flying ants (the big black critters) a day or so ago, which in this part of the UK usually means Thundery Strums.

    No TS yet...but they would clear the hot and sticky air, which TICTH. There's only so much cold Polish ALE I can drink in one afternoon...

    IJ

  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Someone recommended Vit. B as a repellent against Wee Bitey Things - apparently they can sense the scent of it and don't like it. In fairness, I haven't been eaten as badly this year as when we first moved here - that summer I felt as if I was more bite than skin.

    We've got another party next week, in someone's garden*, which will doubtless give the wee blighters another magnificent repast.**

    * It's a gorgeous garden - she's a really keen gardener - but even so ... :worried:

    ** My late father (RIP & RIG) was fond of describing any meal he enjoyed as a "magnificent repast", and it's sort of become a catch-phrase.
  • MooMoo Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    When I lived in New Hampshire, I used to get bitten frequently by mosquitoes and black flies. Then I started taking garlic pills, and the bites didn't happen nearly so often. After I moved back to Virginia, the
    garlic pills were much less effective.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Maybe the Wee Bitey Things in Virginia have more sophisticated palates! :mrgreen:
  • HuiaHuia Shipmate
    Trampers (hikers) here often eat extra marmite, which has a lot of vit B, to ward of the bitey insects. As a target of such beasties it doesn't seem to work for me.
  • KarlLBKarlLB Shipmate
    Huia wrote: »
    Trampers (hikers) here often eat extra marmite, which has a lot of vit B, to ward of the bitey insects. As a target of such beasties it doesn't seem to work for me.

    They'd have to be pretty nasty bitey things to be worse than eating marmite.
  • Gath fachGath fach Shipmate
    O love Marmite but it doesn't keep the bitey things away from me. I particularly dread encountering a horsefly as I get a rather bad reaction to their bites
  • Bishops FingerBishops Finger Shipmate
    edited July 2018
    Gosh, yes- horseflies are Big Bitey Things!

    Does even Marmite not keep them off? Mind you, I suppose one could always smear them with Marmite - that would perhaps dissuade them from biting people...

    BTW, I love Marmite. On TOAST. Every morning.
    :grin:

    IJ
  • Penny SPenny S Shipmate
    On my cruise to Iceland I religiously ate Marmite for breakfast every day in preparation for the visit to Myvatn - or Midge Lake. It worked brilliantly. The day we were there, there was a wind, and the Tiny Bitey Things stayed at base in the heather.
  • I do hope the wind was not a by-product of the religiously-consumed Marmite, IYSWIM.
    :flushed:

    IJ
  • North East QuineNorth East Quine Purgatory Host
    My grandfather claimed that he could ward off midgies and other wee flying bitey things by swearing at them in Gaelic. It did seem to work for him, although possibly the puffs of tobacco smoke from his pipe helped. Or perhaps his frequent recourse to a dram or two made a difference.
  • LydaLyda Shipmate
    KarlLB wrote: »
    Huia wrote: »
    Trampers (hikers) here often eat extra marmite, which has a lot of vit B, to ward of the bitey insects. As a target of such beasties it doesn't seem to work for me.

    They'd have to be pretty nasty bitey things to be worse than eating marmite.

    Maybe you need to smear it on you. :wink:
  • HuiaHuia Shipmate
    My grandfather claimed that he could ward off midgies and other wee flying bitey things by swearing at them in Gaelic.

    I had a maths teacher who swore at us in Gaelic - it may not have had the desired effect on the bitey things but it put me off maths for life.
  • Penny SPenny S Shipmate
    I do hope the wind was not a by-product of the religiously-consumed Marmite, IYSWIM.
    :flushed:

    IJ
    I do seem to have an unfortunate habit of wording things ambiguously and not noticing until later. I had hoped not to be noticed by anyone else!

    BTW, I think some of the midges were lurking at the hotel, since people standing in the doorway were performing the Ballarat salute (I am reminded of this as I am watching a programme set in that town.) I found the term in my sister's Australian dictionary. It is the waving of the hand across in front of the face to dispel the blighters.
  • ClimacusClimacus Shipmate
    How interesting...I've never heard of the Ballarat (a city in Victoria) Salute...only the Australian Salute. I can see why those in Melbourne (state capital) would use it given Ballarat is out in "the bush".

    I went to Lake Myvatn in winter...the blighters were too frozen to come out then. :smirk:
  • I am with you, Climacus. Then, I live in NSW and not Victoria and know other sayings can differ from state to state.
  • Penny S wrote: »
    I do hope the wind was not a by-product of the religiously-consumed Marmite, IYSWIM.
    :flushed:

    IJ
    I do seem to have an unfortunate habit of wording things ambiguously and not noticing until later. I had hoped not to be noticed by anyone else!


    No, no - it's not you - blame my peculiar sense of humour!
    :wink:

    IJ

  • Penny SPenny S Shipmate
    Penny S wrote: »
    I do hope the wind was not a by-product of the religiously-consumed Marmite, IYSWIM.
    :flushed:

    IJ
    I do seem to have an unfortunate habit of wording things ambiguously and not noticing until later. I had hoped not to be noticed by anyone else!


    No, no - it's not you - blame my peculiar sense of humour!
    :wink:

    IJ

    Well, I had spotted the possibility before reading your post! So I may have a slow engaging, but similarly peculiar sense of humour.

    And interesting about the salute. My sister got the dictionary when in Leederville, Perth, WA, and brought it back with her. It was a proper one, not just a tourist one, and that was the only thing that stuck from my brief encounter with it. Most of the words were not distinguishable from UK usage. (She may have got it so her sons, if using their right to go out there, had access to appropriate language use.)
  • LeoLeo Shipmate
    Bus Drivers who don't know where the bus stops are
  • CaissaCaissa Shipmate
    TICTH Croatia.
  • LydaLyda Shipmate
    The whole country or just the football team?
  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    edited July 2018
    Grossly unfair to a small but lovely country.

    PS what happened to meeting with triumph or disaster and treating those two imposters just the same?
  • Ah, but this is Football, and one should take religion seriously.

    Agreed that Croatia (Ah! Happy Memories!) is a lovely country.

    IJ
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    I've never been to Croatia, but I'll be rooting for them in the final, as I like it when the little guy wins.
  • Bishops FingerBishops Finger Shipmate
    edited July 2018
    TICTH the Most Unholy Trinity, aka The Three Esses.

    To wit, Sport, Shopping, and Slebrities - all of which keep the majority of the population of Europe away from the worship of Almighty God on His holy day.

    Woe, woe, and thrice woe!

    (OTOH, despite being Scottish/Irish - and about to apply for Irish citizenship - I shall not be too cross if bonny Croatia should win the World Cup. Like our enlightened and sympathetic sister piglet, I'm happy when the little guy wins).

    IJ
  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    Another one for the Shamrock Lifeboat.

    I tell you, if all the holders of Irish passports go back to the Oul’ Sod at once, it’ll sink under the weight.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Didn't their citizenship application web-site crash the day after the Brexit vote?
  • Piglet wrote: »
    Didn't their citizenship application web-site crash the day after the Brexit vote?

    Like the Canadian citizenship application web-site crashed -- was it the day after the U.S. election or the day of the inauguration?
  • Other people's air conditioners which make an infernal noise at the level that conversation isn't possible and although a lovely evening, or cannot be enjoyed.

    And second that there are no laws to prevent them from having put the thing one the side of their newly built hovel in our line of hearing.

    Oh they're nice people alright. The kind who would pray for us in our distress. Well I've hired a fellow whose going to build us a wall to keep their noises and prayers out. There is no law that it cannot be 22 feet high. Will start with 7 or 8. So there you $#!÷%*;&#!!!
  • Well I've hired a fellow whose going to build us a wall to keep their noises and prayers out. There is no law that it cannot be 22 feet high. Will start with 7 or 8. So there you $#!÷%*;&#!!!

    Build the wall!
  • ZacchaeusZacchaeus Shipmate
    Rossweisse wrote: »
    TICTH people who drive through a blinding rainstorm without bothering to turn on their lights. If they don't care about being visible, how about the fact that (hereabouts, anyway), the law says that you must turn on headlights when the windshield wipers are on?
    Pigwidgeon wrote: »
    Well I've hired a fellow whose going to build us a wall to keep their noises and prayers out. There is no law that it cannot be 22 feet high. Will start with 7 or 8. So there you $#!÷%*;&#!!!

    Build the wall!

    If he does a god job you can send his contact details to Trump (or Donald Fart as our young grandughter calls Him

  • ZacchaeusZacchaeus Shipmate
    aplogies for the start of that post, it is completely irrelevant - it was from a post that i never posted months ago which for some reason the text box refused to let me delete!!
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