Cancer SUCKS

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  • As a professional in the field, I can tell you that your wariness is all too well placed, @Lamb Chopped. So many things don't get past stage three, for whatever reason.
  • ArielAriel Shipmate
    edited August 2023
    This is true... I'm still waiting to hear about a cure for dementia yet. Every time I read an article it's something like "...miracle breakthrough... slows it by 15%..." which in effect is hardly anything. But each time, it gets a step further in the field of medical science.

    And meanwhile, this is definitely an improvement on the existing if they've got that many cancer patients into remission so far.
  • Please pray for me. My mother has pancreatic cancer and I am getting to the point where I wish she would get on with dying. The palliative chemotherapy is submerging her more and more, making it impossible to make the connection which was nearly absent even before this illness. It's a horrible feeling and fills me with g
  • I’m so sorry, it must be very hard for you 🕯
  • Oops sorry. Should have ended with grief and shame
  • How you feel is not unusual, as a nurse I met many relatives in this situation and I remember what it was like with my own mother dying. Hugs to you.
  • How you feel is not unusual, as a nurse I met many relatives in this situation and I remember what it was like with my own mother dying. Hugs to you.

    That helps so much. Thank you for saying that.
  • Yes, a very common feeling and not at all surprising.
  • My prayers for you both. Please know what you are feeling is very normal. My husband died from cancer and I loved him for many years yet when he died I not only felt sad but also great relief.
  • I agree absolutely - the emotions at such a time are so complicated, so hard to express to others and linger for years afterwards. Much love goes to anyone dealing with this.
  • And of complicated emotions, being a long term cancer survivor will bring them on. Why did I get away with it and not (fill in the blank), for example? It's just on ten years since they stopped the chemo that looked more likely to end my life than the melanoma, but the side effects and after effects will always be there. I should be dancing for joy and singing hosannas, but somehow, that's not how it worked out. That's not a complaint; just an observation on how this thing unfolds for some of us - don't ask me to explain. It does, however, lead to a considerable variety in the prayers being offered up at various times.
  • Adding our sympathy and support.
  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    News this morning that an old friend in Ireland has advanced liver cancer and a projected lifespan in weeks.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Prayeds ascending for all here.
  • HuiaHuia Shipmate
    My mother died of cancer. The last time I saw her she knew she didn't have long to live, but I blithely said I would see her in a couple of months (we were in different cities). She died a couple of weeks later. I wish I had been able to acknowledge my grief that this probably was the last time and how much I would miss her.

    When my father was dying in hospital and semi-conscious and in pain I managed to leave his room last so I could tell him what a good father he had been, and tell him that he could let go. He died a few hours later.

    Thunderbunk my thoughts are with you.
  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    I remember the last time I visited my mother in hospital - she in Belfast, me in Edinburgh. I said I would see her again when I was next over. We both knew I was lying.
  • My father died suddenly of his stomach cancer while I was on holiday (he collapsed on the kitchen floor one morning and died there with my mother beside him). I had been home for Christmas and left on Boxing Day for my holiday, I had wanted to say goodbye before I left but he had fallen asleep. I wasn’t expecting him to die so soon and regretted not being able to say goodbye.
    Ten years later I was holding my mother’s hand as she died in the hospice. A very different experience.
  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    It's taken my friend J last evening.
  • So sorry to hear that Firenze 🕯
  • Sorry to hear that Firenze. Comfort prayers for all who loved your friend.
  • Deepest sympathies, @Firenze. Two of my friends have been living with metastatic breast cancer for years - decades, really, their lives extended through rounds of chemo and (sometimes multiple) surgeries. Both of them have seen the cancer return in the last month. One of them has opted for hospice care because it's the only way to get the level of morphine required to keep her pain-free. The other is going into hospital for a week to receive some different type of chemotherapy, as she's now immune to the kinds she previously had. I ask your prayers for Linda and for Janice, and (admittedly, selfishly) for me that I might get the right words to say to them, to be present and honest.
  • Praying to be a present, honest friend strikes me as anything but selfish, @Mamacita . I wish my mother had someone to do that with/for her. I just don't seem to be able to utter the relevant words - they dry in my mouth.
  • I'm sure you know, but just being there is huge. It's what I focus on, since I'm pretty sure I'll put my foot in my mouth otherwise.
  • Gracious RebelGracious Rebel Shipmate
    edited October 2023
    I feel it's about time I started following this thread. My partner A was diagnosed with metastatic pancreatic cancer (spread to the liver) about a month ago and life will never be the same. Currently awaiting results of a liver biopsy that will hopefully give an idea of possible life expectancy. This is so hard to navigate, to know what to say and when, how best to support her, and make the most of the time we have left. Being on the autistic spectrum myself, I don't intuitively 'know' how to approach anything new, and this is one helluva new thing, that I really don't want to mess up. Scared and worried.
  • DoublethinkDoublethink Admin, 8th Day Host
    ((GR))
  • Prayers ascending for GR and partner
  • HeavenlyannieHeavenlyannie Shipmate
    edited October 2023
    Hugs for you both GR
    🕯
  • Prayers for all. They found a spot on my mammogram last month but I can not be seen until the end of the year for a follow-up. I am taking that as meaning they are not worried that it is cancer, never the less the wait is a bit stressful.
  • Hugs for @Gracious Rebel and @Graven Image . (And thank you all for the support.)
  • SarasaSarasa All Saints Host
    Prayers for all that post here.
  • I have a follow-up ultra-sound tomorrow. Glad to finally be able to get an appointment a wee bit nervous.
  • Best of luck!
  • MaryLouiseMaryLouise Shipmate, Host Emeritus
  • HuiaHuia Shipmate
    Graven Image I hope it went well for you.
  • jedijudyjedijudy Heaven Host
    edited November 2023
    I hope your scan comes out the best possible, @Graven Image !
  • Graven ImageGraven Image Shipmate
    edited November 2023
    Thanks all my scan appointment follow up is today. Glad to finally get an answer.
  • Well, looks good as these cysts are usually not cancer they say, but will do a follow-up biopsy to make sure. I am glad for the biopsy, but one snag is I am changing insurance plans come January 1st so hope they can get me in before I have to change doctors in the middle of this.
  • Oooh, changing doctors, that sucks. My sympathy.
  • Oh, I'm glad. I also got word that my minor surgery left clean margins and I don't have to have anything else done. (It was a precancer wanting to be a melanoma when it grew up)
  • So good to hear of all these reprieves. My own chronic lymphocytic cancer is (apparently) not going anywhere. So it will be the worsening artificial heart vlves that will do for me.
    They have been working sorta OK for nearly ten years so I'm not complaining ... just wish I had more energy.

    Blessings to all ...
  • Oh, I'm glad. I also got word that my minor surgery left clean margins and I don't have to have anything else done. (It was a precancer wanting to be a melanoma when it grew up)

    That is excellent news. It's one of those things that can really spoil your day if left a bit too long, as in, "Oh, don't fuss - it's just a mole".
  • RockyRoger wrote: »
    So good to hear of all these reprieves. My own chronic lymphocytic cancer is (apparently) not going anywhere. So it will be the worsening artificial heart vlves that will do for me.
    They have been working sorta OK for nearly ten years so I'm not complaining ... just wish I had more energy.

    Blessings to all ...

    And blessings to you as well. May a perk of energy be yours today.
  • Went with A for her first appointment with the oncologist yesterday, great guy with a no nonsense approach. The liver biopsy had confirmed the diagnosis, and she'll shortly be starting on chemo, we have another appointment on Monday to find out all about the chemo process. She was applauded for her attitude of acceptance coupled with positivity .. plus the fact that she's relatively young (59) and fit, so going into this in better shape than many of his patients both mentally and physically. However there's no guarantee that this world class chemotherapy (thank you NHS for the free treatment!) is actually going to help at all, will have to scan again after a while and see if the tumours are responding.

    In the meantime her period of full sick pay from her employer is already coming to an end, so financially we'll already be taking a hit pretty soon.
  • All the best to you both
  • Please pray for miss RR, going for a battery of tests for a brain tumour. She is a brave Christian lady, recently told she was clear of the breast cancer she was treated for 5-6 years ago. And now this.

    Lord, have mercy.
  • MaryLouiseMaryLouise Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    Prayers for miss RR, and for all here in need of prayer.
  • The prayer mat is down for miss RR.
  • We are down to the wire. Biopsy is on Dec. 14th. 10 working days for the results which makes it Dec. 29th my insurance changes January 1. Hopefully, they are faster so I can see my MD for results before I have to change doctors. One good thing I can go online myself and view my results, but no chance to have things explained ask questions, or do a follow-up if needed. UGG
  • Thank you for all prayers . Blessings to all, and prayers for all of you. My beloved brother in all has just had his last chemo for lymphoma and is doing well. I pray we will both be well enough to see each other in 2024.
    I prayed with Miss RR yesterday. It comforted us both.
  • I am scheduled for a biopsy on Thursday, yet my GP's office called today to say my doctor is sending me on referral to a surgeon. Very upsetting could we get the results first before scheduling me for surgery? As I am changing doctors anyway because of a change in insurance in January ( Now I am happy about that) I told them I would not be going to see the surgeon. I am very upset, but trying to think it is all some kind of a crazy mistake.
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