Limerick

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  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    Spike wrote: »
    A limerick penned by said Ken
    Was read by a critic called Ben
    Who said it was worse
    Than most other verse
    Because the last line didn’t rhyme

    Or have the correct rhythm for a limerick either ! Perhaps

    A limerick penned by said Ken
    Was read by a critic called Ben
    Who said it was worse
    Than most other verse
    Because the last line didn’t have rhyme
  • SpikeSpike Ecclesiantics & MW Host, Admin Emeritus
    Gee D wrote: »
    Spike wrote: »
    A limerick penned by said Ken
    Was read by a critic called Ben
    Who said it was worse
    Than most other verse
    Because the last line didn’t rhyme

    Or have the correct rhythm for a limerick either ! Perhaps

    A limerick penned by said Ken
    Was read by a critic called Ben
    Who said it was worse
    Than most other verse
    Because the last line didn’t have rhyme

    I was happy with my version
  • Spike wrote: »
    A limerick penned by said Ken
    Was read by a critic called Ben
    Who said it was worse
    Than most other verse
    Because the last line didn’t rhyme

    Ha ha vg tick @Spike

    A new start:

    A spider creating a web
  • la vie en rougela vie en rouge Purgatory Host, Circus Host
    A spider creating a web
    Began the first side in Zagreb
  • A spider creating a web
    Began the first side in Zagreb
    Shelob was her name
    A demon of fame
  • jrwjrw Shipmate
    A spider creating a web
    Began the first side in Zagreb
    Shelob was her name
    A demon of fame
    But was helped with the web by friend Deb

  • Deb was a Spider from Mars
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Deb was a Spider from Mars
    Who loved to eat choc-o-late bars
  • EnochEnoch Shipmate
    Deb was a Spider from Mars
    Who loved to eat choc-o-late bars.
    At Ljubljana or Laibach
    She thought of England; that's kack!
    She mozied to Munich for Oompahs.

    A young man from a Heidelberg Korps

  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    A young man from a Heidelberg Korps
    Thought that most of the Prussians were bores.
  • A young man from a Heidelberg Korps
    Thought that most of the Prussians were bores
    But a Teutonic Knight
    Spoiling for a fight
  • A young man from a Heidelberg Korps
    Thought that most of the Prussians were bores
    But a Teutonic Knight
    Spoiling for a fight
    Thought it right that he should declare war

    ___________

    By contrast, a soldier from Essen
  • By contrast, a soldier from Essen
    Wanted to teach everybody a lesson
  • By contrast, a soldier from Essen
    Wanted to teach everybody a lesson
    So he loaded his gun
    With a large current bun
  • NenyaNenya All Saints Host, Ecclesiantics & MW Host
    By contrast, a soldier from Essen
    Wanted to teach everybody a lesson
    So he loaded his gun
    With a large current bun
    Which he'd bought from the delicatessen.


    A custard and whipped cream confection

  • jrwjrw Shipmate
    A custard and whipped cream confection
    Went inside a tin for protection
    They rolled through the streets
    Through country, past bleats
    They've now lost all sense of direction


  • AgsAgs Shipmate
    An upstanding person from Warwick
  • An upstanding person from Warwick
    And her very good friend, called Yorick
  • jrwjrw Shipmate
    An upstanding person from Warwick
    And her very good friend, called Yorick
    Were treated to lunch
    By a friend named Rick Funch
    When the bill came they said, "Are you sure, Rick?"

  • Cedric, a randy young goat
    Went a-wooing and crossed the old moat
  • Cedric, a randy young goat
    Went a-wooing and crossed the old moat.
    He met a young nanny

  • Cedric, a randy young goat
    Went a-wooing and crossed the old moat.
    He met a young nanny
    She was ever so canny
    And he took her to ol John O'Groat

  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    In a field near to Kettering fair
    All the world flocked to Greenbelt, went there
  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    Miffy wrote: »
    In a field near to Kettering fair
    All the world flocked to Greenbelt, went there

    When a hole in my tent…

  • In a field near to Kettering fair
    All the world flocked to Greenbelt, went there
    When a hole in my tent
    Made the canvas all rent
    And let in the rain and cold air!

  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    As I wandered to church one Sunday
    A tiger I met on the way
  • As I wandered to church one Sunday
    A tiger I met on the way
    The fire of his eyes
    Burning bright
    An immortal hand framed his symmetry

    (oops.. - with apologies to William Blake)
  • SpikeSpike Ecclesiantics & MW Host, Admin Emeritus
    There was a young lady from Lydd
  • la vie en rougela vie en rouge Purgatory Host, Circus Host
    There was a young lady from Lydd
    Who went to an auction and bid
  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    There was a young lady from Lydd
    Who went to an auction and bid
    For a cat in a box
    And an untamed fox
    and a purebred albino kid.
  • A three-legged hamster called Joe
  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    A three-legged hamster called Joe
    Was concerned at the shape of each toe.
  • A three-legged hamster called Joe
    Was concerned at the shape of each toe.
    He climbed the high wire
    His balance was dire
    But said let's get on with the show!

  • A boxer with a cauliflower ear
    Called into a pub for a beer
  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    A boxer with a cauliflower ear
    Called into a pub for a beer.
    He decided on ale,
    But turned rather pale
    When told "We've none on tap here".
  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    I woke to grey clouds and damp rain
    To rise from my bed was a pain
  • I woke to grey clouds and damp rain
    To rise from my bed was a pain
    I stretched with a yawn
    It was only just dawn
    So I turned over and went to sleep again.
  • There was once a small infant called Dotty
  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    There was once a small infant called Dotty
    Who woke wanting to use the potty.
  • jrwjrw Shipmate
    There was once a small infant called Dotty
    Who woke wanting to use the potty.
    She was one of quintuplets
    Her mum had said "Rupe, let's
    Now they had five cots - Cot A to Cot E

  • Now Rupe was so proud of his quiver
    That he bought them a boat for the river
  • EnochEnoch Shipmate
    Now Rupe was so proud of his quiver
    That he bought them a boat for the river.
    The river, alas was the Nile
    Where a hungry crocodile
    Reduced A to E to a sliver.

    So parents when choosing pursuits
    That will educate your little shoots

  • So parents when choosing pursuits
    That will educate your little shoots
    Give them Potter and Finnigan
    And some good ol Spike Milligan
    To get them all laughing in hoots

  • A laughing hyena on the plain
  • A laughing hyena on the plain
    Rejoiced in the name of Plain Jane
  • A laughing hyena on the plain
    Rejoiced in the name of Plain Jane
    Her laughter drew attention
    From many a direction
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    A laughing hyena on the plain
    Rejoiced in the name of Plain Jane
    But another hyena
    Had a name that was meaner
    And it was that one that rose to quick fame.

  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    A laughing hyena on the plain
    Rejoiced in the name of Plain Jane
    Her laughter drew attention
    From many a direction
    And all pleas to stop were in vain.

  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    edited August 2022
    It's not just hyenas that're filled with laughter
  • It's not just hyenas that're filled with laughter
    If it’s a good old belly chuckle you’re after
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