It’s now Feb and the Springtime is near
And the sounds of sweet birdsong we hear.
March, April and then ‘lo’
It’s time for NaPoWriMo,*
But I can’t get this to scan at all I fear. 😁
*which is what inspired this thread in the first place.
A funny old woman named "Spike"
Had a longing to buy a new bike.
As she pedaled, limbs failing,
Over the handlebars she went sailing,
And now she's content with a trike.
It’s now March and the Springtime is dear,
Not just NaPoWriMo is near,
But Ship’s Eurovision
Please make a decision
Do sign up and join all of us here!
As fresh from the pool I emerged
My swimming trunks stayed there, submerged
My ghast was quite flabbered
My flab was quite blabbered
About, and my innocence dirged.
With words that are just crowbarred in
I wondered if this was a sin
"No" said the Pope
"But your crowbar, I hope
Will help me to, my mobile, get in."
[Edit: Added squiggly line as a divider, which makes it easier to see that one Limerick has ended, and a new one can be started. Wesley J, Circus Host]
Said a young armadillo called Matt
Do you think in this suit I look fat?
Said his friend the small pig
"It's your bum that looks big"
But your head looks quite small in that hat.
[Edit: Added squiggly line as a divider, which makes it easier to see that one Limerick has ended, and a new one can be started. Wesley J, Circus Host]
It’s a Sunday and time to get dressed
(Not the Em'pror's New Clothes - you'll have guessed!)
Donning cassock and surplice,
The poor priest they heard this:
Felt nudity might leave all less stressed.
Clad seasonally in a green stole
Clad seasonally in a green stole
Was Ratty's great friend, Mr Mole.
For activities riparian,
Was their clothing Tractarian?
Did they have a nice picnic with rolls?
A lassie who lived in Milngavie
Made a parachute drop from the skavie
Landing square on the floor
She said "wow, that is sore,
But you do have to laugh or you'd cravie"
A lassie who lived in Milngavie
Made a parachute drop from the skavie
Landing square on the floor
She said "wow, that is sore,
But you do have to laugh or you'd cravie"
Once on a rainy Saturday in summer
Oh the lack of the sun was a bummer.
Though good for the garden
For bad language say pardon
As you drive away merrily in your Hummer
While serving this morning at church
Once on a rainy Saturday in summer
Oh the lack of the sun was a bummer.
Though good for the garden
For bad language say pardon
As you drive away merrily in your Hummer
While serving this morning at church
While serving this morning at church
All good sense it was left in the lurch
The hymn numbers were wrong
The sermon too long
And the church budgie fell off its perch.
Comments
Christmas comes out of nowhere
With lots of anguish, many a tear.
The jumper tight?
Its thread too light?
So much food, it's hard to bear!
Went out for a meal with a wren
“Dear Lord” said the goose
“Bless this food for our use
And us to thy service. Amen”
And the sounds of sweet birdsong we hear.
March, April and then ‘lo’
It’s time for NaPoWriMo,*
But I can’t get this to scan at all I fear. 😁
*which is what inspired this thread in the first place.
Had a longing to buy a new bike.
As she pedaled, limbs failing,
Over the handlebars she went sailing,
And now she's content with a trike.
Apologies to The Ship's Spike, for any confusion.
Not just NaPoWriMo is near,
But Ship’s Eurovision
Please make a decision
Do sign up and join all of us here!
There once was a president-ex
With diminutive organs of sex.
Who when charged with exposure,
Declared with composure,
"De minimis non curat lex."*
*"The law does not concern itself with small things".
I refuse to believe that it's dead.
It got lost, maybe under the bed
It was kinda forgotten
Like a piece of old cotton
But never be said it is dead!
Beat me to it! I like the change you've made to line 2, where I've only seen "very small". The version I started with was:
There was a law student called Rex
Who had very small organs of secx.
When charged with exposure
He replied with composure
"De minimis non curat lex".
(The law is not concerned with trifles)
Let’s be of good cheer….
It's too bloody hot - I've turned red.
I'm installing a nice swimming pool
I'm installing a nice swimming pool
My mojito is ready
I'm holding it steady
I don't want to look like a fool!
My swimming trunks stayed there, submerged
My swimming trunks stayed there, submerged
My ghast was quite flabbered
My swimming trunks stayed there, submerged
My ghast was quite flabbered
My flab was quite blabbered
About, and my innocence dirged.
😲
I wondered if this was a sin
I wondered if this was a sin
"No" said the Pope
"But your crowbar, I hope
Will help me to, my mobile, get in."
[Edit: Added squiggly line as a divider, which makes it easier to see that one Limerick has ended, and a new one can be started.
Do you think in this suit I look fat?
Do you think in this suit I look fat?
Said his friend the small pig
"It's your bum that looks big"
Do you think in this suit I look fat?
Said his friend the small pig
"It's your bum that looks big"
But your head looks quite small in that hat.
[Edit: Added squiggly line as a divider, which makes it easier to see that one Limerick has ended, and a new one can be started.
(Not the Em'pror's New Clothes - you'll have guessed!)
(Not the Em'pror's New Clothes - you'll have guessed!)
Donning cassock and surplice,
(Not the Em'pror's New Clothes - you'll have guessed!)
Donning cassock and surplice,
The poor priest they heard this:
Felt nudity might leave all less stressed.
Clad seasonally in a green stole
Was Ratty's great friend, Mr Mole.
Was Ratty's great friend, Mr Mole.
For activities riparian,
Was their clothing Tractarian?
Was Ratty's great friend, Mr Mole.
For activities riparian,
Was their clothing Tractarian?
Did they have a nice picnic with rolls?
Made a parachute drop from the skavie
Landing square on the floor
She said "wow, that is sore,
But you do have to laugh or you'd cravie"
Bonus points for that one.
Oh the lack of the sun was a bummer.
Oh the lack of the sun was a bummer.
Though good for the garden
For bad language say pardon
Oh the lack of the sun was a bummer.
Though good for the garden
For bad language say pardon
As you drive away merrily in your Hummer
While serving this morning at church
All good sense it was left in the lurch.
All good sense it was left in the lurch
The hymn numbers were wrong
All good sense it was left in the lurch
The hymn numbers were wrong
The sermon too long
All good sense it was left in the lurch
The hymn numbers were wrong
The sermon too long
And the church budgie fell off its perch.
Freshly garnished (like Pimms) with some borage
I look at my spurtle
Call up my friend Myrtle