Kyzyl - this is the place to come to for cursing and praying, often enough at the same time. You are in good company here; we are with you and for you.
Kyzyl - this is the place to come to for cursing and praying, often enough at the same time. You are in good company here; we are with you and for you.
Thank you. I am a loooooong time lurker on the Ship.
A-ha! Now all this information is coming out here (State of Israel) with people suffering as I did after their second Pfizer jab. Weakness, temperature, shivers ... generally ghastly.
Heaven alone knows what will happen to me. But I will be at the strongest point in my drug-cycle when I get it.
Ghastly might be a bit strong for it--I watched Mr. Lamb go through it, and it was basically a "go to bed and be cranky with a fever and chills" kind of thing, but it lasted less than 24 hours (he's in his early seventies). It might also help to consider that the reactions which make the paper (Twitter, etc.) are going to be the strongest and nastiest (and rarest)--the folks who say, "eh, I had a sore arm and a headache" won't get interviewed. (This is my attempt to cheer you up, forgive me if it does the opposite!)
Does anyone know what the wiggle room is in a prognosis of "2 to 3 months, maybe more"? Or is that akin to asking how long is a piece of string?
Dad was told that on the 21st September 2020, and that he "might see Christmas, but probably not"
There was then a flurry of activity, visits and care plans drawn up in readiness by the community nurse and Mcmillan nurse etc etc. And then we paused, waiting for Dad to get ill.
Since then he has become progressively more tired, but he doesn't look ill, isn't in pain, and doesn't have any care needs.
It's brilliant that Dad is still "well." I speak to him on the phone every day and it's a joy. I can't describe the delight with which I wished him "Happy Christmas" on Christmas Day, and "Happy New Year" on Jan 1st. If he's still here for his birthday in March I will be overjoyed.
I'm concerned about my mother, who is 87 and has been on high alert for any signs of decline for four months now. She's also suffered the loss of two old friends (from cancer and Covid respectively) during that four months. Not to mention that we're in the throes of a pandemic.
What does "2 to 3 months, maybe more" really mean? Could the "maybe more" bit extend "2 to 3 months" to 6 months, for example?
When I may dad was told at Easter (2014) he had terminal pancreatic cancer, they gave him 2-3 months. He died at the end of October, and was only bedridden at the start of September. Up to that point, he'd regularly mowed the lawn (it's a big-ass lawnmower) and reroofed the garage (with metal sheeting). We even yoinked the kids out of school for what we thought would be the 'last visit' in June.
Honestly, 2-3 months is a guess based on the doctors' experience of the pathology of the disease and how it progresses. It's not based on the individual patient. Your dad could, like my dad, decline quite quickly at the end, but that's not terrible.
The answer is, yes, maybe. It's going to happen, and it may happen quickly, or slowly, or some combination of the two. Because no one has any control over that timing, you just have to let it run and be at peace with that.
Thanks, Doc Tor. I think I am at peace with it, and Dad says he's at peace with it. We've been able to talk, and that's been a blessing. However, my brother and I are both worried about our mother. She's coping very well, but the stress is showing.
I moved in in the September, so that I could carry some of the load for caring for both of them. That might be something you want to discuss with your mum. Not me moving in, obviously. You or your brother.
I moved in in the September, so that I could carry some of the load for caring for both of them. That might be something you want to discuss with your mum. Not me moving in, obviously. You or your brother.
My suitcase is packed, I can move in anytime. But at the moment, Dad doesn't need care. Mum needs emotional support, but I'm not sure if me being there would be any improvement on me phoning twice a day. Covid complicates everything of course- I'm not visiting them at all, and my brother, who lives within walking distance of them, isn't going into the house, but speaking to them from their garden.
And then her oncologist told her that her date of expiry would be probably somewhere in March or April 2020, and she had great pleasure (and so did he) in wishing him a happy May Day, before going on until November.
A good friend was told in autumn 2019 that she might have four months, but all is still well. She is well organised, remaining independent with supporters and has some not-so-good days, but no sign of an imminent end yet, thank goodness.
Chatted with old friends in Scotland yesterday and asked how S was doing, knowing that she's been dealing with pancreatic cancer for far longer than anyone thought possible. "Not bad at all", she said, "they've just increased the morphine dose by 300%". I can't think of anything to say.
Same with my mother, BF, and my heart was gladdened that her suffering was eased and her eternal reward expedited.
I also watched a dear friend slowly suffocate from the effects of motor neurone disease ; she’d have died quicker and much more peacefully if she’d had adequate morphine. I think the hospice staff feared criticism for knocking her off.
Was it really necessary for you to tell my contact in the peer support group that he only had eight months to live? You didn't know and you knew you didn't know, and you still don't know, and he's proved you wrong anyway.
Today I take my last pill in drug cycle #37
Which is 2 years 306 days of meds
Which the average effectiveness of my drug is 22 months according to the company who manufacture it
Which is pretty amazing!!!!
Which is not to say there have not been some hellish times ... but I am still here.
Indebted to all for ongoing support ; prayers, thoughts, candles of various hues and fragrances. prayers prayed at particular Shacks and Shrines, etc, etc
Good to hear the news, Galilit! And extra points for a good news post down here. The encouragement fits nicely between all the prayers and curses. (The friend I mentioned a few posts back just called again sounding pretty excited too - the chemical warfare is working for him as well).
Comments
Thank you. I am a loooooong time lurker on the Ship.
Heaven alone knows what will happen to me. But I will be at the strongest point in my drug-cycle when I get it.
Dad was told that on the 21st September 2020, and that he "might see Christmas, but probably not"
There was then a flurry of activity, visits and care plans drawn up in readiness by the community nurse and Mcmillan nurse etc etc. And then we paused, waiting for Dad to get ill.
Since then he has become progressively more tired, but he doesn't look ill, isn't in pain, and doesn't have any care needs.
It's brilliant that Dad is still "well." I speak to him on the phone every day and it's a joy. I can't describe the delight with which I wished him "Happy Christmas" on Christmas Day, and "Happy New Year" on Jan 1st. If he's still here for his birthday in March I will be overjoyed.
I'm concerned about my mother, who is 87 and has been on high alert for any signs of decline for four months now. She's also suffered the loss of two old friends (from cancer and Covid respectively) during that four months. Not to mention that we're in the throes of a pandemic.
What does "2 to 3 months, maybe more" really mean? Could the "maybe more" bit extend "2 to 3 months" to 6 months, for example?
Honestly, 2-3 months is a guess based on the doctors' experience of the pathology of the disease and how it progresses. It's not based on the individual patient. Your dad could, like my dad, decline quite quickly at the end, but that's not terrible.
The answer is, yes, maybe. It's going to happen, and it may happen quickly, or slowly, or some combination of the two. Because no one has any control over that timing, you just have to let it run and be at peace with that.
My suitcase is packed, I can move in anytime. But at the moment, Dad doesn't need care. Mum needs emotional support, but I'm not sure if me being there would be any improvement on me phoning twice a day. Covid complicates everything of course- I'm not visiting them at all, and my brother, who lives within walking distance of them, isn't going into the house, but speaking to them from their garden.
@Kyzyl , it's good to see you; are you still in MN? Sending love and prayers.
Hello Amos. Yep, still in the frozen tundra. Or in my case, frozen river bluffs.
My update isn't good. Both cousins are still declining. It looks like just a few months perhaps for either. Please keep them in your prayers.
My heart was NOT gladdened, whilst hers was stopped.
I also watched a dear friend slowly suffocate from the effects of motor neurone disease ; she’d have died quicker and much more peacefully if she’d had adequate morphine. I think the hospice staff feared criticism for knocking her off.
Was it really necessary for you to tell my contact in the peer support group that he only had eight months to live? You didn't know and you knew you didn't know, and you still don't know, and he's proved you wrong anyway.
I've just noticed that it's been over a month since the previous post on this thread!
<<votives>> for all still suffering...
Which is 2 years 306 days of meds
Which the average effectiveness of my drug is 22 months according to the company who manufacture it
Which is pretty amazing!!!!
Which is not to say there have not been some hellish times ... but I am still here.
Indebted to all for ongoing support ; prayers, thoughts, candles of various hues and fragrances. prayers prayed at particular Shacks and Shrines, etc, etc
Brilliant News!
(And I note it has not all been sunshine and roses!)
Continuing in prayer 🕯