Limerick

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  • An Australian marsupial called Skippy
  • NenyaNenya All Saints Host, Ecclesiantics & MW Host
    An Australian marsupial called Skippy
    Decided to dress as a hippy

  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    edited July 2022
    An Australian marsupial called Skippy
    Decided to dress as a hippy:
    "What this pouch really needs
    Is some flowers and beads...
  • EnochEnoch Shipmate
    An Australian marsupial called Skippy
    Decided to dress as a hippy:
    "What this pouch really needs
    Is some flowers and beads
    And some baccy to make me feel zippy.

    ________________________

    "Hey man', said young Skippy the 'roo
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Hostly Oink

    @stetson - your habit of "improving" other posters' limericks because they don't meet your standards of rhyme or scansion is becoming rather wearisome, and veering into the territory of junior hosting.

    Kindly knock it off.

    Thank you.

    Piglet, Circus host


  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Back to the limericks.

    @Enoch posted:

    "Hey man', said young Skippy the 'roo
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    Piglet wrote: »
    Hostly Oink

    @stetson - your habit of "improving" other posters' limericks because they don't meet your standards of rhyme or scansion is becoming rather wearisome, and veering into the territory of junior hosting.

    Kindly knock it off.

    Thank you.

    Piglet, Circus host


    My apologies.
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    @Piglet

    Question: Can I still improve my own lines(assuming no one else has added to them)?
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    I don't see why not, if the thread hasn't moved on, and your edit wouldn't make sense any more.

    Back to the limericks.

    @Enoch posted:

    "Hey man', said young Skippy the 'roo
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    edited July 2022
    (Since we seem to be developing a series...)

    An Australian marsupial called Skippy
    Decided to dress as a hippy:
    "What this pouch really needs
    Is some flowers and beads
    And some baccy to make me feel zippy.


    "Hey man', said young Skippy the 'roo
    The squares who are running the zoo
    Are harshing my buzz...



  • "Hey man', said young Skippy the 'roo
    The squares who are running the zoo
    Are harshing my buzz...
    My head’s in a fuzz
    But I won’t make a fuss or todo.

  • A Bear with a very sore Head
  • A Bear with a very sore Head
    Was so angry that it saw red
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    A Bear with a very sore Head
    Was so angry that it saw red
    He growled and then
    Slouched off to his den
    And took his sweet honey to bed.
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    There once was a dashing young florist
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    There once was a dashing young florist
    Who went to pick flowers in the forest
  • There once was a dashing young florist
    Who went to pick flowers in the forest
    He tripped over a log
    And fell into a bog
  • There once was a dashing young florist
    Who went to pick flowers in the forest
    He tripped over a log
    And fell into a bog
    The undertaker said it was his goriest.
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host

    A bog snorkeller, once snorkelling along
  • NenyaNenya All Saints Host, Ecclesiantics & MW Host
    A bog snorkeller, once snorkelling along
    Tried to jazz up his swim with a song

  • MiffyMiffy Shipmate
    Nenya wrote: »
    A bog snorkeller, once snorkelling along
    Tried to jazz up his swim with a song

    When he opened his mouth

  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    A bog snorkeller once snorkelling along
    Tried to jazz up his swim with a song
    When he opened his mouth
    His breathing went south
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    A bog snorkeller once snorkelling along
    Tried to jazz up his swim with a song
    When he opened his mouth
    His breathing went south
    And the Fates all just gave him a gong.

    Reference to The Gong Show, a mock talent-show in the 1970s, where the judges would bang a gong to get an act off the stage.

  • NenyaNenya All Saints Host, Ecclesiantics & MW Host


    A judge on a mock talent show
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    edited July 2022
    A judge on a mock talent show
    One year, ran amok at Lent, so...

    By the way, you can remove my ellipses when posting the next line. They're just there to indicate syntactical continuity.
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    edited July 2022
    Delete
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    A judge on a mock talent show
    One year, ran amok at Lent, so
    He told the emcee
    "There'll be no meat for me!"

    You can continue this as a quote, or switch back to the narrator.

  • NenyaNenya All Saints Host, Ecclesiantics & MW Host
    A judge on a mock talent show
    One year, ran amok at Lent, so
    He told the emcee
    "There'll be no meat for me,
    I'll have sweet fries and pizza to go."

  • There was a Young Man on a Bike
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    There was a Young Man on a Bike
    Who ran down a jaywalking tyke



  • There was a Young Man on a Bike
    Who ran down a jaywalking tyke
    ‘What’s your game?’ said he
    Looking at his grazed knee
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    There was a Young Man on a Bike
    Who ran down a jaywalking tyke
    ‘What’s your game?’ said he
    Looking at his grazed knee
    Shrugged the man: "I just do what I like."


  • EnochEnoch Shipmate
    There was a Young Man on a Bike
    Who ran down a jaywalking tyke
    ‘What’s your game?’ said he
    Looking at his grazed knee,
    "And why shouldn't I do what I like?"


    Walkers should stick to the pavement

  • jrwjrw Shipmate
    Walkers should stick to the pavement
    Unlike in the story of Dave Kent
    Who walked in the road
    Ignoring the code
    And he soon found himself to the grave sent

  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    A driver approaching a yellow
    Thought "Hey, I'm a maverick fellow"
    He pounded the gas
    But it then came to pass
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    edited July 2022
    A driver approaching a yellow
    Thought "Hey, I'm a maverick fellow"
    He pounded the gas
    And it then came to pass
    That they warbled his dirge on a cello.
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    A hitchhiker stuck on a freeway
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    A hitchhiker stuck on a freeway
    Will always get plenty of leeway


  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    stetson wrote: »
    There was a Young Man on a Bike
    Who ran down a jaywalking tyke
    ‘What’s your game?’ said he
    Looking at his grazed knee
    Shrugged the man: "I just do what I like."


    When I were but a lad in shorts, "tyke" here could also mean Catholic. Not exactly complimentary.
  • stetsonstetson Shipmate
    edited July 2022
    Gee D wrote: »
    stetson wrote: »
    There was a Young Man on a Bike
    Who ran down a jaywalking tyke
    ‘What’s your game?’ said he
    Looking at his grazed knee
    Shrugged the man: "I just do what I like."


    When I were but a lad in shorts, "tyke" here could also mean Catholic. Not exactly complimentary.

    Thanks for the info. I'd never heard that before. No offense intended.
  • SpikeSpike Ecclesiantics & MW Host, Admin Emeritus
    I’ve never heard that either. I’ve always understood it to mean a mischievous child
  • BroJamesBroJames Purgatory Host
    Likewise
  • BroJamesBroJames Purgatory Host
    The Oxford Dictionary of English gives
    tyke
    ((also tike) )
    ▶ noun
    1. informal a small child, especially a cheeky or mischievous one: is the little tyke up to his tricks again?
    ■ [usually as modifier] Canadian an initiation level of sports competition for young children: tyke hockey.
    2. dated, chiefly British an unpleasant or coarse man.
    3. a dog, especially a mongrel.
    4. (also Yorkshire tyke) British informal a person from Yorkshire: Geordies and tykes have never got on particularly well.
    5. Australian/NZ informal, derogatory a Roman Catholic.
    [[early 20th century: alteration of Taig. ] ]
    In sense 2 and 3 the word is apparently derived from the Norse word tik - a bitch
  • EnochEnoch Shipmate
    Gee D wrote: »
    When I were but a lad in shorts, "tyke" here could also mean Catholic. Not exactly complimentary.
    No. That's new to me as well. There's Taig which does mean Catholic, also derogatory, which makes me wonder whether using 'tyke' to mean Catholic may derive from mis-hearing it.

  • BroJamesBroJames Purgatory Host
    That’s certainly what the Oxford Dictionary of English thins. See my post above.
  • Bishops FingerBishops Finger Shipmate
    edited July 2022

    There was an Old Man with a Fan*

    *(think topical, or not, as you prefer)
  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    edited July 2022
    stetson wrote: »
    Gee D wrote: »
    stetson wrote: »
    There was a Young Man on a Bike
    Who ran down a jaywalking tyke
    ‘What’s your game?’ said he
    Looking at his grazed knee
    Shrugged the man: "I just do what I like."


    When I were but a lad in shorts, "tyke" here could also mean Catholic. Not exactly complimentary.

    Thanks for the info. I'd never heard that before. No offense intended.

    I'd not even thought of your usage, or lack of awareness being offensive.
    Spike wrote: »
    I’ve never heard that either. I’ve always understood it to mean a mischievous child

    There is that meaning as well.
    Enoch wrote: »
    Gee D wrote: »
    When I were but a lad in shorts, "tyke" here could also mean Catholic. Not exactly complimentary.
    No. That's new to me as well. There's Taig which does mean Catholic, also derogatory, which makes me wonder whether using 'tyke' to mean Catholic may derive from mis-hearing it.

    I'd never heard of "taig"; the word as far as we were and are concerned is "tyke".
  • NenyaNenya All Saints Host, Ecclesiantics & MW Host
    There was an Old Man with a Fan
    Who decided to try the cancan

  • There was an Old Man with a Fan
    Who decided to try the cancan
    But he kicked much too high
    And showed too much thigh
  • SpikeSpike Ecclesiantics & MW Host, Admin Emeritus
    There was an Old Man with a Fan
    Who decided to try the cancan
    But he kicked much too high
    And showed too much thigh
    Imagine the rest if you can

    ———————

    One day as I basked in the sun
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