Headlines of Utter Weirdness

1262729313258

Comments

  • HedgehogHedgehog Shipmate
    Gee D wrote: »
    From a report in "Wales Online": North Wales Police were called at 10.45pm after reports of “disorder” near the popular Llŷn Peninsula pub, which in 2016 hosted a visit from Prince Charles and Camilla. By then the warring factions had dispersed. Is it me, or does the grammar suggest that the factions had dispersed by the time HRHs came to visit?

    How dare anyone have a brawl at venue visited by the Prince of Wales and his doxy?
    I am more puzzled why they would wait 5 years to start the brawl. Talk about holding a grudge!
  • Well, indeed!
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    I think you'll find she's been his wife for quite a while ... :mrgreen:
  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    edited July 2021
    Piglet wrote: »
    I think you'll find she's been his wife for quite a while ... :mrgreen:

    She was his doxy longer than she's been his wife.
  • It is an expression I find misogynistic, as it is language that measures a woman’s moral behaviour differently to a man’s. Just my opinion though.
  • LydaLyda Shipmate
    It is an expression I find misogynistic, as it is language that measures a woman’s moral behaviour differently to a man’s. Just my opinion though.

    I agree. What is a similarly nasty term for a man in such a relationship "her...what?" I can't think of one with the same level of spite.
  • Pimp or whoremonger were the traditional ones--but you'll note that both of those suggest he's hiring her out to other people as well.
  • HeavenlyannieHeavenlyannie Shipmate
    edited July 2021
    ‘His doxy’ rather suggests ownership of an immoral woman by a man. A woman as chattel.
    An adulterous woman might be called a mistress or prostitute but a man is not called an equivalent derogatory term within the relationship. His status does not change.
  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    edited July 2021
    Lyda wrote: »
    It is an expression I find misogynistic, as it is language that measures a woman’s moral behaviour differently to a man’s. Just my opinion though.

    I agree. What is a similarly nasty term for a man in such a relationship "her...what?" I can't think of one with the same level of spite.

    Paramour comes to mind., with its strong overtones of impropriety. And I used "his" to convey what Heavenly Annie talks of.
  • Why not use the word mistress, which conveys the message that the Duchess of Cornwall has been involved with the Prince of Wales for more years than they've been married, without the unnecessary misogyny?
  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    I'd have thought that mistress did so also.
  • la vie en rougela vie en rouge Purgatory Host, Circus Host
    Hostly beret on

    This discussion of whether a term is sexist is starting to take over the thread somewhat. It doesn't really belong in the Circus.

    Let's get back to badly drafted headlines.

    Hostly beret off

    la vie en rouge, Circus host
  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    I apologise
  • From "The National" in Wales: "Father and son due to launch first-ever Welsh bourbon". I thought it was about biscuits (which would get soggy if launched) but no - it's whisky. Apparently it is "stored in virgin American oak barrels for two years before being shipped to Wales" and then "blended with Welsh water" to produce a "liquor with sweet vanilla, caramel and toffee undertones".
  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    I like 'blended with Welsh water' or, as we say, diluted.
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    A nicely coloured one from the Grauniad, probably on purpose: :)
    Irish people in Great Britain to get green light to visit friends and family
  • HedgehogHedgehog Shipmate
    Firenze wrote: »
    I like 'blended with Welsh water' or, as we say, diluted.
    Barrel proof can get as high as 160 proof (80% alcohol) so bourbon often has water added to bring the intensity down (usually to the 80 to 100 proof range). I discussed the legal requirements on another thread. By U.S. law, only whiskey made in the U.S. (and following the requirements) can be called "bourbon" but it sounds like the Welsh father & son are waiting the 2-year time period needed to be "straight" bourbon in the U.S. and then shipping it to Wales for finishing. I wonder if that will be good enough to evade the naming restriction?
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    From The Guardian:
    Restoration work wipes smile off the face of Dutch vegetable seller

    ... which actually is about the restoration of a painting, not current problems in the Netherlands' agriculture!
  • Maybe not weird but surely worth an honourable mention

    Ultimate Slip N Slide ‘pulled from schedule following explosive diarrhoea outbreak’

    Happy Friday 😄
  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    I'd say that that was most definitely weird. It may take the prize for the year.
  • Apparently this was a headline from the Express today which has since been updated to something less amusing "EU plot sparks farmers fury as Brits ‘look to Brussels to fill empty shelves".

    Clearly Christmas has come early.

    The updated article still contains the immortal line "five miles away there is a field of wasted courgettes" which makes me wonder if they have have a lot of weed in the field.)
  • Maybe not weird but surely worth an honourable mention

    Ultimate Slip N Slide ‘pulled from schedule following explosive diarrhoea outbreak’

    Happy Friday 😄

    There are some posts here that I wish I hadn't read. I'll explain later.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Some of us have to read them ... :flushed:
  • Heard on BBC Wales news this evening: news of two darts players who've made it through to the next round of a competition in Blackpool. Apparently "they'll be facing each other on Tuesday".

    Sounds a bit dangerous ...
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    They might easily get deflated.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Like a sort of modern duel - darts at forty paces?
  • HedgehogHedgehog Shipmate
    From the BBC:

    Shooting rocks restaurant not far from White House

    Now I know people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones, but are they suggesting that restaurants shouldn't shoot rocks near the White House?
  • What's a shooting rocks restaurant?
  • Perhaps this is its clientele: https://tinyurl.com/ksstdw9m
  • Surely, no one could expect rocks of some size and weight to travel very far. What caliber rocks are they dealing with?
  • BroJamesBroJames Purgatory Host
    Oh I thought it meant shooting at rocks.
  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    There was an anti-lockdown demonstration in Sydney yesterday. A pot plant was thrown at a police horse, hitting it. The horse is said to be in a stable condition.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Poor horse. :cry:
  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    edited July 2021
    Piglet wrote: »
    Poor horse. :cry:

    Two men, protesters, have been charged. No doubt that any bail conditions will have them on a tight rein.
  • Perhaps their energies will be harnessed for the good of the community.
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    Gee D wrote: »
    Two men, protesters, have been charged. [...]

    Did the horse charge them?
  • Yes, they had parked on a double-yellow line.
  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    Wesley J wrote: »
    Gee D wrote: »
    Two men, protesters, have been charged. [...]

    Did the horse charge them?

    You'd hope so but probably not.
  • Mastercard or Visa?
  • Gee DGee D Shipmate
    Hoofcard, accepted everywhere
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    All these equestrian puns are unde-neigh-ably well inspired, but for this horse to stay its course, I shall rein them in for now, as The Washington Post has this:
    Korean broadcaster apologizes for ‘inexcusable’ gaffe at Olympics

    Can you excuse the inexcusable? Seems like a contradiction in terms.
  • mousethiefmousethief Shipmate
    edited July 2021
    Wesley J wrote: »
    All these equestrian puns are unde-neigh-ably well inspired, but for this horse to stay its course, I shall rein them in for now, as The Washington Post has this:
    Korean broadcaster apologizes for ‘inexcusable’ gaffe at Olympics

    Can you excuse the inexcusable? Seems like a contradiction in terms.

    Ah but can you forgive the inexcusable?
  • EnochEnoch Shipmate
    A spoken headline I've just heard, on the radio news not on a page, but just as odd,

    'X (a not very well known figure in professional football) has been charged with beating up his wife in the Y Magistrate's Court'.

    One had to listen for a sentence or two to discover that the attack had taken place on a different day and somewhere else.

  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    It would have made the magistrate's job a lot easier if he'd committed the offence right under his nose, wouldn't it?
  • Not exactly a headline, but the first sentence of a report in our local online news:

    A teenager was attacked while riding his electric scooter through a park which was then taken by a group of men.

    Quite what the men have done with the stolen park is not yet known...
  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    "The Scottish mice helping to rewild Ealing"

    If ever there was a creature capable of returning Ealing to primordial forest it would be a mouse eyeing you beadily and asking Who you looking at Jimmy?
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    edited July 2021
    Mice in kilts, tossing timbers? Well, twigs, more likely.
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    The Guardian has this time-travelling headline:
    Ancient Gilgamesh tablet seized from Hobby Lobby by US authorities

    Makes you wonder what operating system the tablet had.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Cuneiform, apparently. As mentioned in Gilbert & Sullivan:
    When I can write a washing-bill in Babylonic Cuneiform
    And tell you every detail of Caractacus's uniform ...
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    Here's not a headline, but an interesting description for a Brook Taverner Dinner Suit Jacket:
    Composition: 54% Polyester, 454% Wool, 2% Lycra
Sign In or Register to comment.